St. Wolf Residence
Sunnydale, California (the Wandererverse)
Late hours
12 December
1998
As Angel started forward, Buffy muttered, "We'd better---"
"No," Robin said, grabbing Buffy's arm. When she looked at him, he said, "Let him go. Trust me."
Angel moved up to Vamp Willow and Vamp Xander, who looked at him with tears flowing down their cheeks. They knew that if anyone in the training room deserved payback, it was him. Angel looked at both of them, raised the stake up...
...and dropped it at their feet.
"I forgive you."
Vamp Xander huddled the sobbing Vamp Willow closer to him, not sure he'd heard Angel correctly. In a choked voice, he said, "What?"
Angel knelt down, and put a hand on Vamp Xander's shoulder, and said, "You didn't torture me, the demons did. I understand that. I know what you're going through. No one else here can but I do. You're remembering how it felt. Killing your parents, your friends, everyone. I know how it feels, the guilt, not just over what you did but how good it felt. Over being powerful, over the power you had. I know how it feels to have it all hit you at once. You'll never forget their faces. You'll never forget their screams. They'll always be with you. But they can only haunt you if you let them."
"You don't understand," Vamp Willow cried, shaking her head. "I killed Mom. I killed Dad, I killed so many people."
Now it was Angel who shook his head. "I do understand," he said, tenderly removing a tear from her cheek. "I'm two hundred years older than both of you put together and I spent over half of that ripping through Europe. I've killed more people than you could hope to. I killed them, I tortured them, I arranged their bodies into shapes, I drove towns insane with fear..."
"Um, pal," Wish Buffy said with a dark frown, "if this is your way of convincing me not to stake all three of you, you ain't selling it well."
Angel ignored the Slayer, looking deeper into Vamp Xander and Vamp Willow's eyes. "My point is this; I know what you're going through. It's the same thing I went through. And at first, I wanted to die, too. But I decided to do something that made me count, to pay them back for what they did. It won't erase what you've done. Nothing can. But maybe, just maybe, you can make peace with yourself."
"Like you have?" Xander asked.
Angel snorted in sadness. "I'm not there yet. But I may be someday. And so can you."
Angel looked over his shoulders at Steve, and asked, "Can the three of us take this outside?"
"Are you kidding?!?" Wish Buffy demanded. "You wanna let THOSE. . ."
"Buffy," Joyce said softly, drawing Wish Buffy's eyes. "Don't."
Wish Buffy started to speak her comeback, but Buffy said, "Don't even open your mouth, sister."
Wish Buffy glared at her, and Steve took the opportunity to nod to Angel.
Angel helped Vamp Xander to his feet, and with his hold on Vamp Willow, brought her up as well. Angel guided them out of the training room.
Wish Buffy turned on Steve, and snarled, "Don't tell me you trust them."
"I trust Angel," Steve said. "And by the way, *you've* been pretty quiet throughout all this."
Steve turned to the subject of his statement, Joan, who stood by silently.
"The decision must be theirs, Wanderer," Joan said. "And please, do not ask me what they will decide, because He has not told me. But now, I must go."
Joan faded from view, at first becoming transparent and then simply vanishing.
"Don't forget to write," Robin called out to the empty spot.
Axel looked over at Joyce, and asked, "Did we just see Joan of Arc help three Amazon witches restore the souls of a couple of kid vampires from another dimension only to find out that they're suicidal, leading Angel to give 'em the 'win one for the Gipper' speech after they tortured him for two years?"
"Yes," Joyce replied dully.
"I thought so," Axel groaned. "Want a drink?"
"I'll get back to you on that," Joyce replied dully.
Angel led Vamp Willow and Vamp Xander outside, and softly closed the door behind him. As they stood in the back yard, Vamp Willow slowly laid her tear-streaked eyes on Angel.
"How can you forgive us for what we did to you?" she whispered, horrified at the memories engraved on her consciousness. "Oh, God. The things I did..."
"Listen to me," Angel snapped, frightening his fellow vampires. "Look, you two. I know what you're going through. But we need to talk about what we're going to do."
"Angel man, what CAN we do?!? The only thing I want to do right now is drive a stake through my heart!" Vamp Xander shouted.
Vamp Willow nodded in despairing agreement.
"Fine. If you want to commit suicide, I can't stop you," Angel told the pair. "But let me say this; these people didn't owe us a anything. In fact, the majority of them are pretty mixed up over this like we are. But they put it aside to give you, to give US, a second chance. You two were robbed of your futures, and you have a lot to work out, but all you need is one thing to make a start."
"We have SHIT, Dead Boy!" Vamp Xander berated Angel. "We killed our families, we lost everything when we got turned, and I *sure* as Hell ain't going back to that bald son of a bitch! Give me one reason to stay alive...yeah right. Alive, ha, ha, ha."
Angel folded his arms, and leaned back against the house. "Okay, I'll give you a reason. The bald son of a bitch."
Vamp Willow and Vamp Xander both stared at him in shock.
"What?!?" Vamp Willow shrieked in terror.
Angel looked over his shoulder, and said, "What I'm going to say can't be repeated in front of the others. Some of them know, but others don't, not yet."
"What are you talking about?" Vamp Xander asked suspiciously.
Angel sighed, and said, "As far as most of the Slayerettes..."
"The Slayer-whats?"
"Xander, the other Xander, named this team the 'Slayerettes' after Buffy being the Slayer," Angel told Vamp Willow. "But listen to me. The fighters here are just part of a very big army that fights vampires and demons. As far as most of the kids here know, Steve's plan is to find us a way home, a way back to our reality. I think you both know we can't stay here."
"I hear a 'but' coming," Vamp Xander said.
"But," Angel said, not wanting to disappoint Vamp Xander, "they have to find a way to get us back first. That's the sticking point. And, to keep you two from saying anything, there's another 'but' coming."
"And that is?" Vamp Willow asked, not understanding.
"Steve intends to bring along a few friends to, shall we say, pay their respects to the Master and his little factory," Angel said, spelling out Steve's plan.
"These kids against four hundred vampires?!?" Vamp Willow babbled. "They can't do that! That's suicide!"
"Willow, remember your fight in the park?" Angel asked. When both the kids cringed, Angel smirked. "Okay. Of the ones you faced, Cordelia and the other Willow are Amazons, like the women warriors of ancient Greece. Willow's also a witch. Xander's been given equal abilities by Robin, the guy who blasted you into that sandbox. Steve and the Buffy from this universe carry the Slayer swords, Japanese versions of Excalibur. Oz, well, he's a special case."
"Oh, yeah. We got to fight Bigfoot," Vamp Xander muttered disgustedly.
Angel decided not to go any further. "And that's just the ones you DID face."
"That Robin guy, the fairy? Who the Hell is he?" Vamp Xander asked. "I can't believe he shot us like that."
"Either of you ever read Shakespeare?" Angel asked.
Vamp Willow perked up, despite her depression. "I did."
"Mid-Summer Night's Dream," Angel said. "Robin Goodfellow."
Vamp Willow paled as the name registered. "He's..."
"Not Puck. Don't ask, because I'm too scared to ask him," Angel said, not joking in the slightest. "But to bring up the point, Steve is known as the Wanderer. I've never heard of the guy, but imagine a demon hunter who was once a Green Beret. I assume you know what THAT is."
"Yeah," Vamp Xander and Vamp Willow muttered. Seconds later, Vamp Xander moaned, "You mean this guy's planning a 'Rambo/ John Wayne/ Full Metal Jacket' fight on the Master?!?"
"A bit different from what the Master's used to fighting, wouldn't you say?" Angel asked with a cruel smile. "You think four hundred vampires can stand up to a few Green Beret/Navy SEAL-type fighters?"
"Uh..."
"Right," Angel said. He looked at Vamp Xander, and said, "So, I can give you one reason to stick around, it's just not a pretty one."
"Payback," Vamp Xander said as he returned Angel's look. "And then what?"
"I don't like it," Vamp Willow said, her depression reinforcing itself. "That's something the demon would do."
"Thanks for the effort, Angel," Vamp Xander said, taking Vamp Willow's sobbing form into his arms. "But I think, no cigar."
Angel looked at the back of the weeping Vamp Willow, and then back at Vamp Xander. He shoved off from the house, and turned to go back inside.
"Well, I can't stop you. I see that you have two choices," he said with tangible regret. "You can either take your own lives, and end it here and now, never getting the redemption that you want, or...you can think about the one thing you DO have, that's closer to you than you realize. Think about it, Xander. The one thing that means more to you than anything. It's too bad you can't see past your depression to help it out of its own pain."
He then walked into the house.
Vamp Xander stared at him, trying to get through the hidden message he knew was in there.
<The thing that's closer to me? The thing that means the most to me is. . .> he thought, before it hit him right between the eyes. He looked down at the silently grieving woman in his arms, and his shoulders sagged. <Angel man, I gotta teach you not to be Cryptic Boy.>
Vamp Xander softly said, "Will, it's going to be all right."
Vamp Willow jerked back, but stayed in his arms. "How can you *say* that?!?" she cried, tears bursting anew. "Xander, all we did..."
"Will, hon, listen to me," the male vamp said, drawing her into his eyes, "Angel said, if we can find one thing to keep us going, we can make a start. We can make it."
"But what?" Vamp Willow said as her lip trembled. "What do we have?"
Vamp Xander, deciding to go slowly, said, "Well, look at this world. I'm in love with Cordelia, you're in love with Oz. Funny, huh?"
"I'm not laughing," Vamp Willow snapped. Her mouth opened as a fresh wall of guilt came up, and she nearly wailed, "Oh, god, how could I laugh through it all? Mom, Dad, Jesse, your parents, everyone. How could I laugh."
Vamp Xander took her up against him in a hug, and he whispered into her ear, "It wasn't us, Will. Not really. You know that."
"I wish it could go away." Vamp Willow cried into his shoulder for a few seconds, and repeated her wish. "I wish it had never happened. None of it."
Vamp Xander moved her away, a small amount of desperation showing in his eyes. "Don't say that. There's one thing I am glad happened."
"What?" Vamp Willow asked, her eyes knitted in confusion over his outburst.
Vamp Xander smiled, and said the one thing that he was glad that happened as part of their vampirism.
"Us."
Vamp Willow looked into his eyes, and saw his honest emotions. "Us?" she breathed silently, but Vamp Xander knew what she had said.
"Yeah, honey. US," he repeated. "Don't you still feel it?"
She swallowed, and tried to speak, but couldn't find the words. "You mean?"
"I mean," he said with the trademark Xander grin.
"You still?" Vamp Willow said, trying not to hope too much.
"I still."
Vamp Willow's tears began to flow again, and she said, "You..."
"Will, I think we've already established that," Vamp Xander grinned.
Vamp Willow began crying harder, and threw herself against her lover, nearly bowling him over onto the ground. She threw kisses all over his cheeks, and finally grabbed his head in both hands and gave him the smacker of all time directly into his lips, not neglecting to slide her tongue in between his teeth. Vamp Xander hugged her for all he was worth, luckily for him she didn't need to breathe.
After three minutes of reaffirming their love for each other, Vamp Willow backed off, tears of regret in her eyes.
"I'm so sorry, Xander. I can't tell you how sorry I am," she blurted out, shaking her head in guilt.
"For what?" Vamp Xander asked in confusion.
"For what? I killed you, I turned you, I made you this! Me!" Vamp Willow cried to him. She shook her head mournfully, and told him, "When the demon took over, it just took all the feelings I always had for you and drove me to you and it just wanted to make you mine. Oh, God, you must hate me."
Seeing the source of her guilt, Vamp Xander took her chin in his hands, and said, "I could never hate you, Will. Never. Look, that night when you came to my house...."
"Oh, God, don't remind me," Vamp Willow wept, looking at the ground.
Once again, Vamp Xander took her chin up to look into his eyes. "Look, just before....you know....you told me you loved me, remember? And I know I should have been paying more attention to how you were coming on so hard and everything but, well.....I was just going to say I felt the same when....you know....."
She shook her head at the memories. "Oh, god, what we did together. For 'love.' Those demons loved, Xander, but us....."
Vamp Xander cut her off, making the point once and for all after what they'd just done. "Willow, I love you. Not the demon, me. I guess I always did but never really faced it. But it's true. What's happened..... well, I guess we could think of it as a fresh start. That Angel guy's right, this isn't going to be easy, trying to live with what we've done and make up for it. But, if you want me to, I'll help you. I love you and I want to do that. Please."
Vamp Willow looked at him, looking at the man she still loved, even after having her soul restored, and asked, "You mean it? You really mean it? All of it?"
"Every word. Hell, Will," he said, chuckling at this admission, "if I'd been turned first, I'd have made you."
Vamp Willow smiled at Vamp Xander's declaration. "That's so sweet," she purred, leaning her head against his chest as he held her. Her face scrunched up as she took in his comment, and said, "Incredibly disturbing on second thought, but still kinda sweet."
Vamp Xander decided not to say anything more. Neither of them needed to.
When Angel walked into the kitchen, he saw Axel waiting for him with a cold beer in his hands.
"Were you listening?" the vampire asked his friend.
"Nah, man," Axel said, somewhat to Angel’s surprise. "I just can’t figure you out."
"What do you mean by that?" Angel asked as Axel took a long sip from his bottle.
"I don’t get you," Axel said, wiping his sleeve across his face. "Last night, you were ‘let’s wipe them out,’ now you’re helping them! These two put you through Hell!"
Angel shook his head regretfully. "The demons did that. That’s not who they are anymore."
"Hey," the detective protested, "after what they did..."
"I want you to imagine something, Axel," Angel interrupted harshly. He sighed, and continued. "Imagine that one moment, you’re going through your life like normal. The next thing you remember, it’s a couple years later, you’re trapped in the body of a demon, you crave blood no matter what and you suddenly remember killing a few dozen people in horrific ways. I had a century on both of them, Axel, and I was a lot more creative. So cut them some slack, okay?"
Axel listened intently to Angel’s plea, and let out an exhausted sigh.
"Okay, man," he said, looking outside. "This whole ‘demon did it/ soul kid didn’t’ thing is confusing."
"Think of it as the ultimate form of being possessed by a demon," Angel offered.
"Without George C. Scott in sight," Axel punned. "So what are they up to?"
"Well, if my message got through to them, one of two things. One, they’re deciding whether or not to join the fight we’re going to take to the Master, or two, they’re making out in Steve’s back yard."
"Making out?!?" Axel screeched. "Angel, they’re vampires!!"
"So?" Angel shrugged. "They’re in love."
"They’re *teenage* vampires!!" Axel exclaimed.
"The point, Axel?"
"What, vampires don’t have hormones?" Axel sarcastically asked. "Dude, they might be dead, but they’re dead teenagers! They ain’t gonna stop at ‘making out!’ And in the dude’s back yard!"
Angel buried his face in his hands as he got Axel’s point. "Okay, I’ll bring them back in."
"You don’t have to," Vamp Xander’s voice said from behind.
Axel jumped in fright, beer sloshing out of the bottle and onto his Mumford High School t-shirt.
"Don’t DO that!!"
"Don’t do what?" Vamp Willow innocently asked, smiling through Axel’s glare.
"Angel, we need to talk to this Steve guy about going back, right?" Vamp Xander asked.
With a smile of approval, Angel nodded and said, "Let’s do that."
Vamp Xander and Vamp Willow led the way, but Axel touched Angel’s hand, wanting to ask him something.
"Dude, how do you guys do that?" the cop asked.
"Do what?"
"The whole commando, sneak-up-on-the-bad-guys thing? Damn, you guys scare people when you do that. What do you do?"
Angel just shrugged, and said, "We just try not to be seen."
Axel rolled his eyes, and said, "That's easy for you to say, you don't have a reflection. Seriously, man, I want to know, just how do you *do* that?"
"I don't *do* anything, it just.....is."
Seeing that Angel couldn’t explain it any better, Axel looked at the Heavens, and said, "You just had to screw with my vacation, didn’t you!"
Thankfully, he didn’t get an answer.
The Slayerettes had filtered into the living room, discussing the subjects of their spell casting.
"Man, I can’t believe I shrieked like that," Willow said after sitting down on the couch. "What must have she done while she was a demon?"
"Hit on everyone in Sunnydale?" Xander said without any intent for humor.
"XANDER!!"
"So Willow there is..." Cordelia started, before taking pity on the pathetic pleading in Willow’s eyes, "you know. What about Xander?"
Xander’s eyes bulged as he moved to defend himself. "Hey, I’m not like that! I’m straight, I like women, I LOVE women!"
Cordelia turned to face him, and arched an eyebrow. "Ahem?" she asked.
"I love one woman," Xander quickly amended with a gulp in fear.
Cordy grinned nastily at him. "Good recovery."
Before anyone could speak further, the trio of souled vampires and Axel walked back into the living room. Willow and Xander looked at their doubles, and the witch decided to see how Vamp Willow was coping.
With a great deal of trepidation, she asked, "You okay?"
Vamp Willow shyly nodded, but started looking Willow up and down. After a few seconds, she said, "Wow. You don’t look anything like I did when I was alive."
"What do you mean?" the confused Willow asked.
With admiration in her eyes, and a playful smile on her lips, Vamp Willow declared, "You look GOOD!"
Everyone (with the exceptions of Vamp Willow, Angel, Shaw and Robin) blinked.
Cordelia, overcoming her shock, turned to the slack-jawed Buffy. "What was that you were saying about vampires being nothing like the people they were?"
Willow turned and walked away, looking confused and angry. Vamp Willow looked at her retreating double, and said, "What?"
"Nice going, Willow," Xander muttered.
Vamp Xander looked angrily at Xander, and said, "Hey!"
"Hey, don’t blame us," Cordelia snapped haughtily. "You’re the one dating a gay vampire."
"She’s not gay!" Vamp Xander protested.
"She’s hitting on Willow," Xander pointed out.
"And she loves ME, dumbass," Vamp Xander came back. He tried to settle down a little, and said, "If there is just one good thing that came out of all of this, it's that I realized how much Willow means to me."
"And you only had to give up your humanity to do it?" Xander asked. He then snapped, "Good call!"
"Hey, you’re the one dating Cordelia. You got no room to talk," Vamp Xander retorted. "Trust me, my Cordelia is the lucky one."
Vamp Willow, moving to defend her Xander, said, "Yeah, she and Xander didn't have to get together."
"HEY!" Xander and Cordelia snapped.
Vamp Xander’s game face started to come forth as his temper grew, but Steve stepped into the middle of the group that was quickly taking sides.
He snapped, "That’s enough. I’m stopping this before it gets out of hand." He looked at Vamp Willow and Vamp Xander, and said, "You two, I want you two to wait in my office, over there. Shaw, go with them."
"Me?" the ranger asked.
"I think you and these two have a few things in common involving homes, don’t you?" the Immortal asked. When Shaw nodded, he said, "Good. You want anyone with you?"
Shaw’s eyes narrowed, as if she thought that Steve was thinking she needed backup, but she then nodded.
"Yes, that would possibly be a good idea," Shaw answered. She looked at Jenny, and said, "Jenny?"
Jenny smiled a little bit, and said, "Okay, Shaw."
"What are you doing?!?" Wish Buffy bit off. "They’re vampires!"
"Buffy," Jenny said with a sympathetic look, "their situation’s much like yours. They’re from your universe, aren’t they?"
"Well, yeah..." Wish Buffy started, but looked at Vamp Willow and Vamp Xander, who were staring at her as they realized that their world’s Slayer was in the same boat as three vampires. Wish Buffy turned away, and said, "Yeah, they are. I can relate."
"Fine," Steve said with a sigh of relief. "Go ahead. Angel, Robin and both Buffys, we need to talk in this room over here and talk about some things. The rest of you, stand down and CALM down. We’ve got enough tension as it is without anyone losing their cool."
Steve turned towards the room housing his computer, and the four people he’d named, Angel, Buffy and Wish Buffy, followed without comment. When the people bound for other rooms left, Xander turned to Cordelia.
"I’m going to get Willow and bring her back out here, okay?" he said.
"Yeah, go ahead. But take Oz with you, I don’t want you two talking behind our backs," Cordelia ordered him.
"Why?" Xander confusedly asked.
"Because I said so, Dweeb Boy," the Amazon said, putting her hands on her hips. "And that’s NOT open for debate if you know what’s good for you and your love life."
"Fine," Xander moaned as the Slayerettes got some laughs in. "Come on, Oz."
The rock band member left with Xander to get his girlfriend.
Jenny and Shaw led Vamp Willow and Vamp Xander into Steve’s office, and offered the two vampires their choice of which seats they wish to take.
Vamp Xander looked at Shaw and asked, "What did your boss mean by having something in common with us?"
Shaw smiled. "It is nice to see that there *are* some things that are consistent with dimensional counterparts."
"Like what?" Vamp Willow asked cautiously.
"That for all of his humor, Xander Harris is much more observant than one would believe at first glance," the half-elf said.
"Thanks," Vamp Xander said, before thinking about it. "Or maybe, ‘Hey!’"
Jenny smiled, but held in her laughter as Shaw continued. "Perhaps a bit of both would suffice. But to answer the question in simple terms, Earth is not my homeworld."
Both vampires stared at her.
"This Earth, you mean?" Vamp Xander asked.
"ANY Earth," Shaw countered gently. "I am from a world known as Abeir-Toril, commonly referred to as Toril. My homeland is Deepingdale, which is about two or three hundred miles due south of Shadowdale..."
"Wait a minute!" Vamp Xander shouted. "Shadowdale?!? As is ELMINSTER’S Shadowdale?!?"
"It is hardly the property of that hawk-nosed, pipe-smoking, spell-casting mother-wenching bastard offspring of a whore born of a pile of orc dung..."
"Shaw..." Jenny warned.
Shaw collected herself, and wearily said, "I am never going to live this down, am I, Jenny?"
"What? Being from a Dungeons and Dragons world?" Jenny asked with a grin at Shaw’s discomfort, having heard all about this weeks ago. "Or that a certain wizard comes to Earth and allows people to write books about your home?"
"The latter," Shaw said sourly, before noticing the stunned gazes of Vamp Xander and Vamp Willow. She sighed. "Yes, I am from that world, in fact I spent eighteen months in Shadowdale a long time ago, training with a Harper in that community. But, as it turns out, one of my ancestors was from Earth, who migrated to Toril and married there. So, I have ancestry on both planes, and it does become confusing at times for me, so I can relate to the confusion and other emotions that you are feeling. Plus, I do not have to worry about what my double might be like in your reality or any other."
"Why not?" Vamp Xander asked.
"Because, according to Robin, Toril is one of those few planets that has no alternate timelines," Shaw said. "He told me this privately after our initial confusion regarding you and the others."
"Wait a minute. You don’t have a copy like me and Xander?" Vamp Willow asked.
"And I never will," Shaw said with a shrug.
"Lucky kid," Vamp Xander muttered. "So, you’re really from another world?"
"Yes," Shaw said, moving to more comfortable ground. "Earth is my home now, because I have chosen to live here. But you do have some advantages over me; you might be in another reality, but you do not have to learn about such things as automobiles, airplanes, or...role playing games."
"Very funny," he said.
"I was not joking," Shaw muttered.
"You weren’t?"
"Xander, think about it," Jenny said in good humor. "The books and games about Shaw’s home are based on things that actually happened."
"So?" Vamp Willow asked. "That’s good, isn’t it?"
Shaw glared at Jenny for poking fun at her. She looked at Vamp Willow and Vamp Xander, and asked, "How would you like it if you found out that someone had come to your universe, and decided to go to another universe and sell your life stories? For example, would you want someone to make a television series about the lives of Buffy, Angel, and yourselves on the Hellmouth?"
The vamps didn’t answer, but it didn’t seem to bother them that much.
<Good comeback,> Jenny thought wryly.
"Uh, okay. So how do you find Earth so far?" Vamp Willow asked, switching to another subject.
"It is so different, I try to find the enjoyable aspects in the many things I would never had imagined, let alone experienced, on Toril," Shaw told her.
"Like what?" Vamp Xander asked with a grin. <This should be good.>
"High school," Shaw replied, drawing a dropped jaw out of Vamp Xander. "It is the best way for me to learn about my new home. Then there is your technology, especially recording devices, which have allowed me to ‘tape’ the music I play and to give it to Amy and Willow. Your video cameras that let us record experiences to share with friends and loved ones at a later date, and so forth. I could go on, but it would take hours."
"Oh," Vamp Willow muttered distractedly. "Okay."
"Willow, is something wrong?" Jenny asked.
"I just wanted to talk about the others. I mean, why are they so Wigged out over us?"
"First of all, your behavior," Shaw answered before Jenny could get in a more tactful answer. "Willow does not appreciate your advances. Your doing so frightens and confuses her. Secondly, as I said, like you they are having problems dealing with the knowledge of the changes in your reality. Foremost among these is the fact that the two of you are in love with each other, in addition to Willow’s sexual preferences. I am not one to judge people on those matters, thus Steven choosing me to sit with you and explain these matters."
"So they’re freaked because me and Willow sleep together? That’s what they find strange?" Vamp Xander asked the half-elf. "Okay, I can understand that. They think we’re strange because it didn’t happen in this universe. We’re a pair of teenage vampires in love."
"They do not find that strange," Shaw said.
"But you said..."
"No, I said they are having problems with the situation, not the circumstances."
"Xander, Willow," Jenny said with a smile, "believe me when I say that your relationship is not all that out there. Not compared to some of the relationships we’ve seen."
Vamp Willow looked at the honesty and friendliness emanating from the Gypsy, and asked, "Why are you like this? It's not like we're the same people you know."
With a shrug, Jenny said, "Except for a bite on the neck, you could have been." She stood up, and walked over to Vamp Willow. "Willow, Xander, I’m not going to claim that I know what you’re going through, or what you’re feeling. But I’ve known your counterparts for over two years now, and I can tell you, you don’t seem all that different from them when they were the age at which you were both turned. You just have some catching up to do, if you take my meaning."
"How do you know so much about us?" Vamp Xander asked cautiously.
"Well, let’s see," Jenny drawled. "First of all, I’m from the same Gypsy clan that restored Angel’s soul a hundred years ago. Second, I’m a witch. Third, I’m an Amazon. Since the Willow from this universe qualifies on the last two, I know her very well. As for the first, I know what it was like for Angel, so I know what you might be going through. The fourth, and last reason, is even easier to understand."
"What’s that?" Vamp Willow asked.
"I’m their computer teacher," the smiling Amazon told them.
"Not in our universe," Vamp Willow said. "I’ve never seen you before."
"That doesn’t really surprise me, Willow," Jenny told them. "It seems that so much is different in our universes. I just want you both to know that I’d be willing to listen to anything you want to get off your chest before you leave for home."
"A teacher wanting me to get something off my chest?" Vamp Willow said with a seductive smile. She looked down at her own cleavage, and then at Jenny once again, her intent unmistakable. "If you say so."
"Stop right there," Jenny said with a frown. "That’s part of the reason the others are nervous around you. You can’t just go hitting on everyone in plain sight."
"Why not?" Vamp Willow asked innocently.
"Because they most likely are not interested in having such relationships with vampires from another reality," Shaw answered.
Jenny sighed. "Shaw, tact. Remember?" she asked, before turning back to the kids. "Xander, Willow, the others will try to get closer to you, and they might even become your friends in the short time you’ll be here. I can tell you that Rupert, Steve and I will gladly help you out with any emotional problems you might have, and I’m willing to stand up for you with the others. I can be your friend, the choice is yours."
"The same would go for me, Willow, Xander," Shaw added.
"Okay, now that we’ve got the ‘Movie Of The Week’ moment out of the way," Vamp Xander said with a wisecrack, "what do we do about the other us’es who don’t like the way we act?"
"I’d suggest that you use restraint in your advances, Willow," Jenny said off the bat. "Like we said, the kids were surprised by the fact you’re sleeping together, and then you were hitting on them. But, I believe that once the kids see that you’re not all that different than the Willow and Xander we know, they’ll loosen up considerably."
"How about you?" Vamp Willow asked Shaw with a seductive smile.
Shaw stared at her, and said, "You cannot be serious."
"Uh Will..." Vamp Xander said warningly under his breath.
"Oh come on," Vamp Willow smiled playfully. "We have a lot in common. I’m from another dimension, you’re from another dimension. I’m not human, you’re not human..."
"I am not interested in such a relationship," Shaw said in a tone of finality.
Vamp Willow caught the tone, and said, "Oh well."
Jenny said, "Let’s go to another subject. I’ve already told you, they were surprised by this whole situation, but I hope it’ll work out. They simply need some more time to know who you really are, and to accept it."
"You think they will?" Vamp Xander asked her.
Jenny smiled. "Well, in your case, Xander, you’re not all that different. And to be honest, I could see Cordelia asking you to help Xander dress up like you do. She’s always complaining about his lack of a fashion sense."
"No kidding," Vamp Willow said quietly.
With a smile, Vamp Xander said, "In defense of myself, ‘Hey!’"
Jenny looked at Shaw, and asked, "What did I just do?"
"I believe the Earth term is, ‘created a monster,’" Shaw replied with a cocked eyebrow. "Not that he needed the encouragement. Now, if you will excuse me, I will go talk to the others. Perhaps we can accelerate their acceptance of the situation."
Shaw got up, and left the room, and the Vamps looked at Jenny.
"Why do I suddenly feel sorry for the other us’es?" Vamp Xander asked.
Jenny smiled wryly, and said, "Because she’s the one person less tactful than Cordelia."
Xander and Oz walked into the training room, where Willow was pacing furiously as she rubbed her arms with her hands. She looked up in fright, only relaxing when she saw Oz accompanying Xander.
"Oh God, can you believe her?!?" Willow asked desperately. "She’s STILL hitting on me!"
"Hey, chill here Willow," Xander pleaded, holding his hands up in a peaceful gesture. "It’s not like she didn’t do it when we saw her in the park."
"SHE DIDN’T HAVE HER SOUL!!!" Willow shouted. "She’s got her soul back and she’s still hitting on me!"
"Willow," Oz said, walking up and putting his hands on her shoulders in an attempt to calm her down, "She’s a different you. You don’t have to worry about it."
"But..."
"I’d like you no matter what you’re like," Oz promised.
Willow looked him in the eye, and saw his love for her again. She swallowed a bit, and said, "I just don’t like this. This whole evil us thing."
"Hey," Amy’s voice called from the doorway, "you’re not the only person having problems."
Xander turned to see Amy and Buffy standing in the doorway, and he said, "Amy, you don’t have that problem."
Amy folded her arms, and said, "Hey, this is hard on all of us."
"You don't have the double who's a vampire," Xander returned with a touch of anger.
"Or one who’s gay," Willow added.
Buffy looked at Willow, and said her piece. "Or deader than both of them inside."
Another voice rang out in condemnation of their attitudes.
"And the three of you refuse to see that they have it worse than you," Shaw said, walking past Buffy and Amy into the training room. She took up a central position, so that all of the other Slayerettes present would have to look at her.
Xander, Willow and Buffy all said, "What?!?"
Shaw looked at Xander, and asked, "Xander, your double. What is he like?"
"Uh, he's me."
Shaw nodded, and told him, "And with any other person like that, you would have become fast friends. Yet you are avoiding him because he is a vampire." The priestess then turned to her best friend. "Willow, what problem do you have with your double?"
Willow said, "She's gay..."
She was quickly cut off. "No, she is bisexual, but I thought you were not the type of person that would judge someone on such matters. Also, she and Xander have both just had their souls restored, and Angel can only help them with this, the guilt they feel, so much. Also, you can help them by listening to them, as they need someone they can confide in. And you are the best choices."
Dreading the possible butt chewing she might receive, Buffy asked, "And me?"
Shaw gave her a neutral look, and told the Slayer, "You are having problems dealing with her because she is not the same person you are, in terms of character. Buffy, she is, personality wise, much like the type of person I was when I first escaped here to Earth. And you have been a great help to me in changing from that person, as you did not judge me for my past deeds or personality. I can relate as well as almost anyone to how she feels, but you are the one person who knows her, her true self, better than anyone."
She then addressed all three of them, and said, "And all three of you together, and to a lesser extent the others, save for Steven, Giles and Jenny, have failed to see that they are dealing with seeing what their lives could have been in this reality, had that Cordelia not made her wish. Also, as the people who have those lives, they think you do not want to help them deal with being ripped away from their homes through no fault of their own. Even the demon inside of Willow, before having her soul restored, said that this world was ‘no fun.’ That is because she misses her home. They all do. And believe me when I say, with a GREAT deal of authority on that matter, that I know, more than anyone, how much that can weigh on one's soul.
Shaw started to turn, but looked at Willow. "Willow, I have told your counterpart about your discomfort over her behavior. But at the same time, you might ask yourself, is there any common ground upon which you might be able to reach out to her and see if you can at least build a common understanding. You could both use it. You, to overcome your fear over what might have been. Her, to overcome her regrets that things did not come out as she would have liked."
"What could we have in common, Shaw?" Willow asked doubtfully.
"Your first love, Willow," Shaw said cryptically. She started to move out, but stopped at the door. "Think about it. The one thing you and her likely had in common, no matter what world you come from."
Shaw left the room, leaving Amy, Willow, Xander, Oz and Buffy to look at each other.
After a long silence, Amy asked, "Does anyone else here feel like kicking themselves?"
Everyone raised their hands.
"What did she mean by your ‘first love?’" Xander asked Willow.
"I don’t know," Willow asked, truly trying to get the meaning behind Shaw’s answer.
"I don’t either," Amy said, looking in the direction her cousin had gone. "But it’s funny, with all our being ahead of her world, it’s the techno-challenged half-elf from another dimension that gets a point across."
"Techno..." Willow whispered to herself, and she brightened when she thought of something.
"Come on," she said, acting surprisingly confident after only a couple seconds. "Let’s go."
St. Wolf Residence
Sunnydale, California (the Wandererverse)
Late hours
12 December
1998
Steve led his group into the computer room and closed the door behind them. While Buffy and Robin stood next to the computer, Wish Buffy and Angel stared at it.
"Oh my God--we’re on the Enterprise!" Wish Buffy shouted.
Angel dryly added, "Which one?"
"Does it matter?"
"Okay, if we can get down to business," Steve asked, turning his attention to the alternates’ situation. He glanced at the most powerful member of the quintet in the room and asked, "Robin, please tell me you can at least figure out a way we can travel to their universe."
"Of course," Robin said, looking quite offended. "We just have to scan their dimensional signatures to determine which reality they’re from. It’ll take a little time to narrow it down exactly, but that’s not much of a problem. Then we get someone like Arty or Obe to get us there..."
Robin stopped, beginning to choke on his explanation as the other four people watched him. Eventually, he spoke.
"US?!?" he freaked.
"Yeah," Steve answered.
Robin began sputtering. "B-b-b-b-but...US?!?!?"
Steve looked at Buffy. "Okay, we’d better figure out who’d work out in this new universe. Buffy, maybe you should call Mulder and Scully..."
"Whoa, whoa, WHOA!" Robin cut in, panicking. "We are NOT Gods damn going!"
"Robin," Steve pointed out, "weren’t you the one who said there was fate in all this?"
Robin stiffened, but replied, "Fate is one thing, Steve, but this is insanity! Do you understand the implications of what you’re planning? Forget for a moment the problems of interacting with your doubles in this universe. What gives us the right to interfere in theirs? Huh? What do you want to do next, go to the universes where the Nazis won World War II and try to stop them? The worlds where America’s fallen and it’s all chaos? As someone who knew Pandora, Steve, I can tell you that opening that box is easy, closing it isn’t so easy, and getting all the contents back inside, is damn-near impossible. Are you going to place us on that slippery slope?"
Buffy pitched in. "Robin, they need our help."
Robin started to shake his head. "Ohhh, no. You cannot lay the guilt trip on me. I want to help them as much as you do, but there has to be a line. And crossing over into alternate realities with muchos doubles does not fall on our side of the line!"
Wish Buffy looked at Angel and asked, "What the Hell are they talking about?"
"Steve’s planning to come with us to our universe and take out the Master," Angel replied with a smile. "He’s going to assemble an assault force to eliminate the threat to our Sunnydale."
"And what happens after that?" Wish Buffy asked, directing her question to Steve and Buffy.
"After we eliminate the Master," Steve answered with a straight face, "we’ll return home. But we won’t return without making sure you and the others are set up to handle any other threats to the Hellmouth."
"What about the REST of the world, you dingbat!" Wish Buffy snapped. "Won’t you do anything for them?!?"
"We aren’t GOING!" Robin screeched. Waving his hands in the air, he snapped, "It’s bad enough we have you guys here, not in the ‘we don’t want you here’ mode, but in the ‘alternate realities encountering each other mode.’ But going to your Sunnydale is bad enough as it is, now you want us to save the REST of your world?!?" The fairy looked at Steve and said, "You see what I mean, Wanderer? This is already spinning out of control!"
"Robin, we wouldn’t try to affect their whole world," St. Wolf assured the spastic fairy. He laid his hands on the table. "We’d take out the vampires in the alternate Sunnydale and set up the people there with a local group like ours."
Wish Buffy’s mouth dropped. She glared at Steve and said, "Great, you and my 'Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm’ double are gonna come crashing in like Mighty Mouse to save the day this one time, then you return to your own world and leave me to handle my shithole world by myself. Do you guys get off on fucking with people or is it just a hobby?"
"Hey!" Buffy snapped in response. "We wouldn’t just do the Lone Ranger ‘save the day and disappear into the sunset act’ on you! We’d find out who else is fighting vamps and demons on your world and try to get you in touch with them. Do you really think we’re that dumb?"
Robin muttered, "Do you really want me to answer that, Buffy?"
Steve and Buffy glared at Robin. Steve said, "Robin, what would you have us do? Send the four of them up against however many vampires are in that Sunnydale?"
Robin hesitated before answering. "Well..."
Steve asked another question. "What else would you suggest then, Robin? Giving them our phone numbers and hoping that one in ten is the same in their universe?"
"Well, no. But..."
"And we *have* done this before," Buffy reminded the sprite.
"Yeah, I know. Still..."
"You’ve done this *before*?!?" Wish Buffy spat.
"Once," Buffy nodded with a grin at her double’s amazement.
"No, no, no, NO!" Robin screeched. "We can NOT just say, ‘road trip to an alternate reality.’ We need to think this through. We have to really, REALLY think this through."
"I have," Steve promised. "We’ll take a selected few from here, but leave major groups out."
"Wait a minute, Steve," Angel objected in surprise. "We’re talking a minimum of three hundred vampires, more likely four. How can you leave your people here when we desperately need them?"
"As much as it surprises me, I’m agreeing with Dead Boy here," Wish Buffy snapped angrily.
"It’s simple," Steve said with a devilish grin. "We leave them here and call in their counterparts from your universe."
Robin moaned and buried his face in his hands. "Oh Gods, we’re dead. Wanderer, do you realize we only have about twelve hours to get them back home?"
"WHAT?!?" Wish Buffy and Angel cried out.
"When you got zapped here, it knocked your auras out of sync," the fairy told the dumbfounded Slayer and vampire. "In another half day or so, your auras will be in sync with our reality. It’ll be impossible to tell exactly which reality you originated from."
"Ohhhhhh, SHIT!!!" Wish Buffy shouted.
"All right, now we’re on a timetable," Steve declared. He turned to his Buffy. "Buffy, you get Willow together enough to discuss this in a rational manner and bring her to the living room to vote on this proposal."
He looked at Wish Buffy and Angel. "You two talk to the other two, and explain the situation to them; make sure they understand we are NOT leaving them in the lurch. Go."
Angel and Wish Buffy quickly moved to fulfill Steve’s directives. Once the other three had left, Steve looked Robin in the eyes.
"Let me take a stab at what you’re about to ask me," Robin sighed. He met St. Wolf’s gaze, and he said, "I didn’t think I’d *have* to tell you since I didn’t know you were planning this psycho joy ride. I thought you’d send them back home to their little slice of the multiverse, but nooooooooooo. You’re going to play the cavalry for them. I’m not trying to be cold here, but I’d appreciate being kept in the loop, you know?"
Steve rested his knuckles on the desk and said, "Point taken, Rob. Now, give me your opinions. One, how do we get an assault force to their universe?"
"Call Arty," Robin said without preamble. "Call her in and she can probably get it done within the time limit. But not before we set up some ground rules. If we break one... Hell, if we even bend one of them, we take the chance of making things worse than they are in that one town."
Steve sighed. "Really? What would you suggest, given your vast experience, for the ground rules?"
"Now you’re listening to reason," Robin said. After breathing a sigh of relief, he formally said, "Rule number one; thou shalt not dilly-dally in said alternate universe. In English, we get in, we do the deed, and we get out. We are not going to change or save the world, we’re going to rescue one town, ixnay on the sightseeing, tourism, or looking at how your doubles are living. Which leads to rule number two; thou shalt not interfere with thy doubles’ lives. If they don’t have it as good as you, let them make it better on their own. If they’re evil, let some other good guy take ‘em out, it’s not your responsibility. The other Willow and Xander were something of a special case because we were too sentimental to just waste them. If it becomes necessary to call on some of the doubles, we limit it to those we KNOW we can trust. And another thing; when calling in people to go along, I’d suggest we try to keep it to those who’ve gone to other dimensions or those who don’t live anywhere near our Sunnydale. Cuts chances they’ll screw things up for their doubles and you know who I’m really talking about."
"Mulder," Steve sighed.
"Right," Robin huffed. He started to tick off on his fingers. "The third commandment; thou shalt not bring back people from the alternate reality. I don’t care if their life sucks so bad they’re willing to drop that universe in a heartbeat so as to live their own life here. That’s their universe, they have to live in their universe, just like the four people we’re sending back. And that leads to the last item; we do NOT mention alternate realities to people in the other universe unless we know they either have experience with alternate realities or are open-minded enough to accept the possibilities. In that case, Mulder’s a prime example. He believes in anything, including stuff *I* would find preposterous."
Steve waited for a few seconds. When Robin didn’t go to a number five rule, he asked, "Are you finished?"
"Yeah," the sprite said with a sigh. "Steve, I don’t like acting like the party-pooper, you know that. But what we’re dealing with..."
"Is a town of people who need our help," Steve reminded him. When Robin started to moan, he added, "And one town it is. As tempting as it might be to help others."
Robin was tight-lipped, but nodded to the Immortal. "All right, you damn boy scout. As long as you understand that you need to rein in the people. I know you humans; you’re too curious for your own good. Eve, Pandora, Alice..."
"Alice?" Steve asked.
"Yeah, Alice," Robin said. "Wonderland? You never read Lewis Carroll?"
At Steve’s look, Robin shrugged. "Never mind."
"Fine," Steve said with relief. "Second, who do we take?"
Robin cupped his chin, and said, "Starting with the simple stuff, most of our team. Also, the Fab Four currently taking up our dimensional space. As for backup, that depends on whom we can get here quick, easy and loaded for bear. One thing to consider is whom we leave here to hold down the fort. The Kendra/Joe/Shaw connection worked last month, but they’re only two-thirds strength right now."
"Okay, I’ll leave Joe and Kendra for patrols, Shaw can at least do research. Anyone else?"
"How about Amy?" Robin asked, much to the Wanderer’s surprise. "Hey, it can’t hurt to have at least one spell caster in reserve. Since she’s an Amazon, and our only blonde Amazon, she could pass for Buffy at first glance."
"So we take Giles, Jenny, Xander, Cordelia, Willow, Oz, Randi, Buffy and you," St. Wolf stated. Working mentally, he added the first group of fighters. "That’s fourteen, counting me and the four natives of the other reality. Axel stays here, since he offered to help. Who would you suggest we ask to go with us?"
"Duncan’s team," Robin started off. "They’re close and I might be able to loophole a teleport since we ARE gathering our forces for a fight against a Big Bad."
"Dana and Fox, too," Steve said next. "Let’s see how they react to this situation. Any others?"
"Please, this’ll be right up ‘Spooky’s’ alley, much as I might wish otherwise," Robin admitted. "And how about Connor? He can bring Max along, let her start earning her keep with Arty. That’s a start."
"All right," Steve said as Buffy walked back in. "Yes, Buffy?"
Buffy had a gleam in her eye, and she said, "The vamps and other me say we kick that bald piece of shit all over the Hellmouth. So did all of us. But we need to keep it on the QT with Mom."
Steve grinned. "Road trip’s on, Robin."
Shaking his head sadly, Robin groaned, "Fine. But when it all ends in tears, don’t say I didn’t warn you."
"Robin," Steve sighed with shrinking patience, "you seem to think that we can’t control ourselves."
"Steve, I’m going to put it this way one time," the sprite said, his lips forming a tight, thin line. "Giles, Jenny and you, I know you have no interest in finding your doubles. Giles obviously is a special case since he’s in that Sunnydale. But what about the kids, huh? They’re teenagers, Steve! They’re going to be teenagers and want to know what it’s like in that other world. Not to mess things up, but because they’ll think it’s cool. Now, part of my problem is that I’m here to protect the guys I empowered; I’m not really one of your soldiers like the Knights, and neither are they. They’re kids. I’m not really your subordinate, Wanderer. I’m someone with people to watch out for, on Obe’s orders, and going to an alternate reality where anything can happen is NOT my idea of protection."
"Are you saying that if we go, you keep the guys here?" Steve asked in a quiet voice.
"Of course not," Robin sighed. He looked at the door and said, "If you order the guys to go, they’ll go since you and Buffy are the leaders of this little band. If they go, I’m going. I’m just NOT happy about it. Steve, this is already starting to spin completely out of control! Have you even talked with Mark and Horace about what the mission is? Do you really think they’re going to jump on the bandwagon to help another reality? They need their people here! You’re reacting with your heart, Steve, and that’s not a good thing. You haven’t given any thought to the rationality of packing up and heading into their universe? You’re trying to help people, I understand. But you need to use your head, not your heart."
"And your suggestion about leaving Amy here? She’s not empowered by you."
Robin’s face flushed a bit and he said, "You know why I suggested that she stay."
Knowing the answer was all he was going to get, Steve nodded. "Right." Steve looked around the room one more time and said, "Okay, we’ll get the others in here and start working on a battle plan. We’ll get going as soon as we can."
"No, you won’t," a crackly voice barked from nowhere.
Steve started, but Robin just sighed in obvious relief. "Finally," the Goodfellow said, "Someone with an objective head on his shoulders."
Merlin appeared out of thin air, his eyes glowing with righteous anger. "I’ve been listening to this bullshit for the last few minutes, Steve. I have just one question for you: What in the Gods’ names do you think you’re doing?!?"
Steve started to answer, but Merlin cut him off.
"You listen to me Wanderer; it was bad enough you went on your little dimensional jaunt back in August, but I let it go because the Q’s can help us prepare for a Gray invasion. It’s bad enough that you have a dimensionally displaced Faerunian on your team, living like an Earth woman, but I let it go because she has some sort of destiny here, plus the fact I don’t want to be on the bad sides of Joanie, Millie and Robin at the same time. But this time there’s no logical, strategic, or sane reason for you to go to this alternate reality, since you had nothing to do with its situation."
Steve couldn’t believe what he was hearing. "Are you saying that I should tell these kids, ‘Sorry, but I can’t help you out since it’s not my reality?’"
While he did have some regret on his face, Merlin nodded. "That’s exactly what I’m saying."
"Sorry, boss. I’m not going to do that," Steve declared. "The Amazons are calling Artemis..."
"Steve, I’m giving you an order!" Merlin snapped. Squeezing his staff, the archmage said, "You listen to me, and you listen to me good, Knight Lieutenant. You’ve been to one dimension to save a person, now you plan to go to a dimension to save a town. In a few months, you’ll have the idiotic brainstorm of scanning through every single, scattered alternate reality in existence with the hair-brained notion of saving every world you can get to! Well I’m stopping this idiocy right here and now. And before you talk back to me as my adopted son, my personal champion, or as a goody two-shoes Boy Scout with a Sword of Destiny, I’m telling you straight up that I will NOT accept your resignation from the Order just so you can head off to realities unknown, and that if you try to do this...I’ll order Marc and Horace to pull any and all support from your group."
Steve couldn’t believe what he was hearing; the depths Merlin was going to in order to keep the team in this reality surprised even Robin.
Desperately grasping at the proverbial straw, Steve asked, "What if you went along? To keep things from going out of control."
"Robin would have done that, Wanderer. Nice try but no cigar."
"Then what WILL it take, Merlin?" the Immortal snapped at his mentor. "You don’t want to leave these kids hanging; I can see it in your face. But that’s exactly what you’re doing; leaving them to fight a battle they can’t win on their own. And another factor in this is Artemis; do you really think she’d let us go overboard? What is it that’s making you go this far to stop us from doing our jobs?"
"That’s the problem, Steve. It’s not YOUR job," Merlin replied with a scowl. "It’s the job of our counterparts in this alternate reality. I can ask Arty if she’ll try to contact the groups that can help these kids, but that’s the best I can do, and the most I’ll allow."
"Nothing will change your mind, then?" Steve asked, feeling defeated for the first time.
"Nothing short of a divine order," Merlin declared with a tone of finality.
Robin snapped, "You don’t ask for much, do you Mer?"
"Consider it given," a raspy voice called out.
"Oh sure, come on in, the more the merrier!" Robin snapped as he looked to the Heavens.
Merlin and Steve looked at JP Withers instead. The brown-clad Atlantean was just starting to puff on one of his trademark cigarettes.
"JP? What are you doing here?" Steve asked. For some reason, he began to feel a dread coming to his stomach since JP was probably here to reinforce Merlin’s orders.
He was wrong.
JP looked at Merlin and drawled, "Divine order, huh? Well, let’s say it’s been handed to you."
"By WHO?" the magician of Camelot demanded.
"You been talking to Joanie?" Robin asked innocently.
JP drew six raised eyebrows with a shake of his head and two words.
"Nope. Mike."
Merlin started to sputter and choke. "MICHAEL?!?" he rasped in shock.
JP gave the wizard an evil smile and blew a smoke circle in Merlin’s eyes. "You really think Joanie would go to all the trouble of going straight to the Big Guy, bypassing Michael altogether, if HE wanted these kids to go it alone? Michael was talking to me at the time, dropping not-so-subtle hints in the way that Archangels are so fond of doing, telling me that it was sort of a needed thing that I get off my ass and head over this way for something that needed doing. And I’m sure you know, Mer, that certain Big Guys are very strict about making sure that their directives are carried out."
"JP, do you realize the troubles this can cause?" Merlin bleated.
JP smiled and said, "That’s why I’M going along, Mer. Between me and Robin, plus a couple of people we might pick up, those being Mike’s words not mine, will keep things somewhat under control."
Merlin and Robin groaned, "Somewhat?!?"
"Hey, there’s going to be UDI," JP replied with a smirk. Sensing Steve beginning to draw breath, he quickly explained. "Universal Duplicate Interaction. We’ve already got the two Willows, two Xanders, a souled vampire, two Buffys, we’re going to have a pair of Ruperts going at it, so we’ve already had some damage. It’s just lucky for us that the Vamps had their souls restored since that negated any damage to OUR timeline. So don’t get on the punk for the restoration, because it actually helped in this case."
"I wouldn’t have ordered their execution, if that’s what you’re asking," Merlin snapped. "I would’ve ordered them sent back as is."
"Knowing what they’re like as soulless vampires?" Steve asked in disbelief.
"Steve, you know what my position’s like!" Merlin snapped. "I’ve had to make hard choices before. One of those was letting Joanie be burned at the stake, when Michael personally came down and told ME not to send a company of Knights to break her out of her prison all those centuries ago! Do you think I have no feelings, Steven? My heart hurts more than yours does, because your decisions only affect a few people. Mine are meant to protect the whole planet. You know I wouldn’t do anything cruel unless I had no other choice!"
Steve watched Merlin for several seconds. Finally, he asked, "Do you have any additions to the rules that Robin suggested?"
"Oh yes," Merlin hissed. Seething at the potential catastrophe that was developing before his very eyes, the wizard decreed, "If and when you get to this alternate Sunnydale, you will NOT go looking for allies in that reality."
"WHAT?!?"
Surprisingly it was Robin’s voice that sounded out. Looking at Merlin in shock he said, "You expect us to take them ALL out by ourselves?!? I know you acted senile last month with this whole Torilian thing but this takes the cake! I’m not thrilled we’re going in the first place, now you’re cutting us off at the knees!"
"If you’d shut up and listen for a second, Goodfellow, I’d finish what I was about to say," the mage sighed in despair.
Goodfellow slowly reigned in his exasperation, took several deep breaths, and said, "Okay. But this better be good."
"I think so," Merlin said before turning to Steve. "This is what I’m going to say to you, Steve. And you better listen up. When you go to the other reality, two people will be in charge of getting allies for you. Those people will be Robin and JP."
Steve looked at Robin and JP in turn. While they both looked surprised, they nodded in agreement. Knowing how rare an agreement between those two (with no comments or wisecracks from either of them) was likely to be, he realized that it was the best offer he was going to get.
"Agreed," Steve reluctantly consented.
"Good!" Merlin snapped in relief. He told Steve, "Wanderer, I don’t like being the hardcase like this. . ."
"Yes, you do," Robin grinned.
"...but I have to put the good of our Earth ahead of all other considerations," the old man finished. "Just be very, very careful about how you do this."
"We’ll keep the youngsters in line," Robin promised. He looked at JP and said, "Right, JP?"
"Right," JP said with a smirk and a puff of his cigarette.
Merlin looked between the two and began to wonder just how much interpretation of his orders the two could come up with between themselves.
<Oh shit.> he thought.
Vamp Willow and Vamp Xander walked into the living room and noticed the uneasy glances that some of the teenagers still gave them. Vamp Willow scowled, walked over to an isolated chair, and sat down. She didn’t look at anyone and had decided they’d tell her about the next phase of the plan.
Willow glanced at Shaw, who cocked an eyebrow at her. Collecting her courage, Willow walked over to her counterpart while Vamp Xander warily watched her.
"Willow?" she asked gently, hoping to find a common ground for a fresh start.
The dejected Vamp Willow softly snapped, "Yeah, what?"
"I'm sorry about freaking," the witch began gingerly. "I just Wigged when you kept hitting on me."
"Oh, so if I don’t hit on you, we can hang, is that it?" Vamp Willow snapped, now glaring at her.
"No!" Willow blurted out. "That’s not what I meant!" She stared at Vamp Willow, then said, "Will...I’m sorry, okay? I'm just not comfortable with it. Well, it's more than that. It's also the whole 'double from another dimension' thing." She paused, then muttered, "I wonder how Patty Duke ever put up with this stuff?"
A surprising burst of laughter escaped from the souled vampire. "I was just thinking the same thing. But really, we don't have anything in common, so I can understand why you don't like me."
Willow protested again. "Hey, I do like you!"
Vamp Willow looked at her strangely, then Willow added, "Well, just not in THAT way, you know?"
"You really think we have something in common?"
"Come take a look at something," Willow challenged her, "and you tell me."
Willow started walking and Vamp Willow looked at Vamp Xander. Vamp Xander looked at Angel, who nodded in partial understanding. Vamp Willow took it as a good sign and followed her living double into another part of the house. Five seconds later, Vamp Willow let everyone know what she thought.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
The Scooby Gang just smiled knowingly, but Vamp Xander started to freak.
"What the Hell did she do to my girlfriend?!?" Vamp Xander shouted.
Shaw provided the answer. "Willow showed her Steven’s computer."
Vamp Xander looked at her, then at Wish Buffy, who just shrugged.
"Computer?" he repeated.
"Yeah," Wish Buffy confirmed.
"Some things never change," Vamp Xander chuckled. "That’s my little Net Demon."
Vamp Willow just stood there, her game face showing due to her excitement. She walked up to Steve and demanded, "What the Hell is that, where do I find one, and who do I have to sleep with to get one?"
Steve, Robin, JP and Merlin just stared at her as Vamp Willow looked around in confusion.
"What?" Vamp Willow asked. "I like computers."
"No kidding," Robin said with a roll of his eyes.
"Uh, sorry," Vamp Willow said, concentrating on getting her human appearance back. "Stupid demon."
"Would you mind waiting outside, you two?" Steve asked. He indicated the trio of men in the room with him and said, "We’ll be out in a minute."
Seeing JP and Merlin in the room, Willow muttered, "Oops. Sorry, Steve."
Steve nodded to them, signaling for them to leave. The two Willows quickly left the room, and Vamp Willow leaned in towards the Amazon.
"Where can I get one of those?" she asked eagerly.
"That’s the only one I know of," Willow replied with a grin. "But maybe the Steve in the other universe has one. If you guys hook up..."
Vamp Willow grinned as the pair rejoined the others. She sashayed up to Vamp Xander and said, "Xander, you won’t believe the computer this guy has in that room!"
Vamp Xander chuckled. "You always did like your computers, hon."
Xander asked him, "How about you, dude? How are you dealing with this?"
Vamp Xander looked at him and sighed. "Okay, I guess. This is going to take a lot of getting used to. You don’t know what it’s like to have all that stuff hit you."
"Maybe not," Xander offered.
He started to say something else but Steve said, "Xander?"
"Yeah?" Both Xanders asked in perfect unison, then groaned in perfect unison.
"I’ve heard of surround sound, but this is too much," Cordelia muttered. When everyone looked at her, she said, "What? I can’t make jokes?"
Willow asked Vamp Willow, "Will, when you remembered, you said something about Mom and Dad?"
Vamp Willow jerked and tears started to flow down her pale skin. "Yeah. I killed them."
"You killed Mom and Dad?" Willow asked in surprise.
"Yeah. Yeah, I did," Vamp Willow said tearfully. "God help me, I did. But, you know, when I looked at Mom...just before...you know...I saw something there I hadn’t seen in such a long time. She finally looked at me like a daughter, not a patient." When Vamp Willow looked back at Willow, expecting to see some form of fear or anger, she instead saw understanding and sympathy.
"I know the feeling," Willow dryly admitted. "She’s never gotten past that."
"I guess," the young vampire agreed.
"Hey, do we really want to know every little detail about these guys’ alternate histories?" Cordelia asked.
"Hey, Cordy," Robin said with a frown, "you’re just jealous because you can’t talk to your double."
"Hey!" Cordelia snapped, before looking at Vamp Xander and Vamp Willow. "Did you two really kill me? The other me?"
When they sheepishly nodded, Cordelia sighed. "Well, that just makes sense. You guys have been a pain in my neck for years."
"HEY!!" the Willows and Xanders snapped in perfect unison.
"Cordelia, although I know this is asking a lot, please try to be a little more sensitive," Jenny suggested. "They’ve no doubt know very little about us; it’d be courteous to listen to them and what they’ve gone through."
"’Cordelia’ and ‘sensitive’ don’t go together very well," Xander said with a smirk. He looked over at Vamp Xander. "How about you? You kill your parents, too?"
"What?!? You’re shocked that I killed Mom and Dad?" Vamp Xander asked.
Xander thought about it, his head moving back and forth a bit, before saying, "No. I'm shocked that I actually understood why you did it."
Vamp Xander nodded. "Drunken rages?"
"Hey, let’s not broadcast it to the world, huh?" Xander begged.
"Which world?" Vamp Willow asked playfully.
"Will..." Both Xanders warned in perfect unison.
"Hey, Xand," Xander asked his double. "What about Jesse? He still alive there?"
Vamp Xander stared at Xander. "He’s not alive here?"
Xander said, "No, dude. He’s not."
"So, Jesse's dead in your world too, huh?"
Xander’s eyes took on a look of sad remembrance, and he said, "Yeah. He got turned. I had to kill him. What happened to him in your world?"
"Vampire drained him," Vamp Xander said in a tight voice.
Xander frowned. "Fine. When we go to your universe, it’ll be payback time. Know where I can find that son of a bitch?"
Wish Xander’s eyes teared up. "You're looking at him."
It took several seconds for his words to register with Xander. When he finally regained his voice, he stammered, "You...you killed Jesse?"
His head nodding, Vamp Xander said, "Yeah. Now you know why I know where Angel's coming from."
"B-b-b-but...this was Jesse!" Xander blurted out. "You killed him!"
Vamp Xander looked straight in his eyes and said, "I know that, dammit! And I’m going to have to live with it forever! So you don’t have to make it worse, okay?"
Xander blinked at the guilt in his counterpart’s voice, and took several seconds to collect himself. He walked over to Vamp Xander, looked him in the eyes, and threw a brotherly hug around him.
"Let me tell you something, dude," Xander said truthfully. "You're not the only one who feels it. Trust me."
Robin mused over this similarity in dimensional outcomes and said, "Interesting. You two both killed Jesse in your own worlds. Guess some things never change, huh?"
The two Xanders, and the other Slayerettes, turned to glare at the fairy, who realized he’d overstepped his boundaries.
"I’ll be leaving now," he said, heading for the kitchen.
"Okay, let’s get back to basics," Steve ordered, getting everyone’s attention. "This is what we’re going to do..."
Steve went into the basic plan for getting a force to the alternate Sunnydale to eliminate the vampire horde ruling the town. It only took a few minutes, but there was already one protest, and despite the many dirty looks thrown towards Merlin over his position, it wasn’t the wizard whom someone decided to have words with.
"You’re leaving me here?!?" Amy snapped at Steve. She looked at the kitchen and shouted, "AND IT WAS YOUR IDEA?!?"
"I plead the Fifth," came the answer from the kitchen.
"You’re the only blonde Amazon we have," Steve said once again. "Robin figures you can pass for Buffy with any non-local vampires."
As Amy fumed, Buffy asked, "Amy, is it that you’re being left out or that you want to see what your double’s like?"
"Oh, please!" the witch snapped. She laughed out loud and said, "The way things look right now, MY double is probably stuck in my Mom’s body while my Mom is still in my body and with my luck drained and turned into a forty-something witch in a seventeen-year-old body with the nightlife curse and spell casting abilities of a witch."
Merlin sighed and said, "Well, at least ONE of these kids has common sense."
Amy glared at Merlin, and said, "Oh, shut up, you Old Fart. You got no room to talk with me after you pulled that shit last month. So don’t EVEN talk about what happened with my Mom."
She felt several eyes boring into her and she looked up to see Wish Buffy, Angel, Vamp Willow and Vamp Xander staring at her.
"Long story," she mumbled. She turned back to the Wanderer and asked, "Steve, do you really think Kendra, Joe, and I can handle this by ourselves?"
"It worked out well enough last month," Giles offered. "And you will have Charlie and Larry to assist, should it become necessary.
"Yeah, but still ..." she said, before giving in. "Okay, okay. I’ll stay."
"Thanks," Steve smiled at her acceptance of the inevitable. "Going with us are; Buffy, Angel, Willow and Xander from the other reality, of course. From our group will be Buffy, Giles, Jenny, Xander, Cordelia, Willow, Oz, Randi, Robin, and myself. Added to the group will be JP."
"Uhm, I have a question," Vamp Xander said, raising his hand. "Why not take the glowing chick with the French accent who shot our souls into us?"
"She’s got other duties, besides she can’t interfere with local stuff or stuff in other realities," Robin answered.
"Who was that chick, anyway?" Vamp Xander asked.
With a sly grin, Buffy answered, "An angel."
Vamp Willow and Vamp Xander’s jaws dropped several inches.
"An angel?" Vamp Willow breathed out in dumbfounded surprise.
"Joan of Arc, if you want to be specific," Xander finished.
"I just called Joan of Arc a ‘chick?’" Vamp Xander asked in fear.
"Yep," Wish Buffy replied.
Xander suddenly stepped away from Vamp Xander, who looked at him in confusion.
"What?" he asked.
Xander gave him the trademark silly smile and shrugged. "I don’t want to get hit by the lightning."
"Shut up, Xander!" Vamp Willow snapped, partly out of frustration, mostly out of not wanting to give certain Heavenly Powers any ideas. She looked at Steve. "Are all the girls here really Amazons?"
"Not all of us," Willow said with a grin. "Me, Amy, Cordelia, and Jenny are. There are a couple of other Amazons around, too. Jenny, Amy and I are witches. I’m Wicca, Amy calls on Hecate and Jenny’s a technopagan."
"You can cast spells through computers or something?" Vamp Willow asked.
"Not exactly," Jenny said with a thin smile. "But it’s been known to happen."
"And you’ve all got boyfriends?" Vamp Willow asked in doubt.
"Of course," Cordelia said with a short snap. "Why wouldn’t we?"
Vamp Xander said, "I thought the Amazons were all lesbians."
The Amazons all moaned while Cordelia shouted, "WE’RE NEVER GOING TO LIVE THAT DOWN ARE WE?!?"
Robin, having walked out of the kitchen, smiled and said, "Better talk to the Anti-Amazon Defamation group or hire a public relations firm."
"Who knows," Vamp Willow purred. "Maybe inside of you..."
Cordelia glared at her, and snapped, "Don’t hold your breath."
Vamp Willow shrugged. "Vampire. Breathing not an issue."
"Aw, GAWD!" the brunette Amazon moaned.
Willow whispered to Vamp Willow, "Uh, Will? Don’t tick off Cordy. Not exactly conducive to one’s longevity."
"Or my love life," Xander added.
Vamp Willow regarded Willow and challenged, "Well, what about you? You’re dating the white hat."
"The what?" Willow asked.
"Him," she elaborated, pointing at Oz. "They told me he’s a werewolf. And you’re dating him?"
"Of course," Willow confirmed. "What’s wrong with that?"
"He’s a werewolf!" Vamp Willow blurted. "I mean, does he change during the full moon and everything?"
"He can control it any other time," Willow said proudly, prompting a small smile from the guitarist.
"He can?" Vamp Willow whispered. When Willow smiled and nodded, she looked at Buffy. "And you think I’M kinky? Even I have my limits."
Willow started babbling.
"Could we please halt this foray into the gutter?" Giles pleaded.
"Here, here," Steve said, seconding the motion. "Listen up. We’ve only got a few hours to get to your universe, so we’re going to call in some backup. We will also try to do our level best to get more from the groups that I’m going to assume operate in your universe. So let’s get cracking! Jenny, would you and the others be so kind as to summon Artemis?"
The teacher nodded as she and the other three went to do just that.
"Xander, Oz, Joe," Steve barked, "Get some weapons selected for anyone who can handle them. H&K G3’s, Uzis, handguns for close in work and hand-to-hand weapons, swords, daggers and knives. We’ll go along as reinforcements get here, see who needs them or brings their own gear." Turning to Angel, he said, "Angel, Charlie, Larry, Randi, Shaw, help them out. Larry, you’re about to get a crash course in heavy military gear. Shaw, start laying blessings on anything you can get your hands on. Standard blessings only, I don’t want to drain your spell reserves. Xander, go through the swords in the armory, see if there’s anything that Angel and the other Buffy might be able to use. Robin, JP, Merlin, let’s get back into the computer room and come up with a battle plan."
The several armory-bound people started to move, and Steve looked at Vamp Willow and Vamp Xander. "You two, come with me. Willow, you seemed impressed with my computer."
Vamp Willow’s face lit up in anticipation, and Steve smiled back at her. "You’re going to give me, JP, and Robin some detailed plans on the Master’s base of operations based on the layouts we have of the counterparts here. Xander, your input will help us plan an assault. Let’s go."
Vamp Willow virtually sprinted into the computer room and Steve couldn’t help but admire the way her bottom moved in the tight leather outfit she wore.
"Giles," Steve said to the librarian, "go through the spell books and decide what spells might come in handy during a group assault. I get the feeling we’re going to need them."
"Of course," Giles said, bursting into action.
Steve turned to Buffy and said, "Buffy, come with me, and bring Buffy with you."
Buffy nodded as the Wanderer headed for the computer room, but paused as she saw Wish Buffy taking off for the front door.
Buffy rushed to catch up and caught her double just as she stepped out the front door. "Hey, where do you think you’re going?"
"I need to be alone," Wish Buffy snapped. "Go back inside."
"Hey, we need you in there," Buffy protested to Wish Buffy.
The alternate Slayer began laughing humorlessly. "Why? It’s not like I’ve ever been to this hick town. I never even heard of it before my Watcher told me to show up." She looked up at the sky, and sadly lamented, "And that’s the entire reason for this. I never came here."
Buffy stepped around her and saw tears flowing out of her eyes. She couldn’t believe that this cold woman was crying so easily.
"Hey, what’s wrong?" Buffy asked.
Wish Buffy looked at Buffy and Buffy could see not only sadness in her eyes, but anger. Anger directed at her.
"I'll tell you what's wrong! I'm jealous of you, that's what! You've got everything here and I ain’t got crap! You've got Mom, you've got friends, you've got a boyfriend, and you've got a frickin' life! I don't have any of that! And you know what? I can see what I am because of one frickin' change in this universal shit, it wasn’t even MY fault, and it makes me sick! I haven't got anyone to help me, I haven't got anyone to love, and I can't even feel shit anymore. Do you know what that's like? Of course not, you bitch, because you haven't had to lose anything!"
Buffy stiffened at her outburst. She still felt some sympathy but wasn’t happy about the criticism. "Yeah, well I can tell you what I lost. That night, instead of losing Mom, I lost Merrick in the amusement park. And I said the Hell with it; I almost quit right then and there. I lost Angel because of the fine print in his curse that he'd lose his soul if he ever became happy. It was my fault that he lost his soul. And he killed God knows how many people because of that. And it WAS my fault."
"I don’t get it," Wish Buffy said through her tears. "How is it your fault?"
"I made him happy," Buffy told the other Slayer. "We fell in love and I made him happy. And before you ask, I'm sure you can figure out how I made him happy. So my life hasn’t been anything like the ‘It’s A Wonderful Life’ picnic you’re thinking it’s been. But, if you need to talk to someone, there is somebody you can talk to."
Wish Buffy let out a bark of sarcastic laughter. "Who? You?" she snapped harshly.
Buffy just let her twin vent. "No," she replied. "Mom."
Wish Buffy whirled on Buffy, bewilderment in her eyes and on her face. "You can’t be serious!" she got out despite her shock.
"Why not?" Buffy asked sincerely. "You need someone to talk to, don’t you? You want to talk to her, since she IS Mom, even with all this dimensional junk going on. She’ll listen in a heartbeat. I know it’s not easy..." Buffy rolled her eyes and confessed, "Okay, it’s way hard for both of us, but hey, I want to try to get off on the right foot here. Heck, it’s almost like having a sister I can argue with and stuff."
"Arguing?" Wish Buffy asked with a weird look on her face.
"Hey, it seems that’s what we do best, right?" Buffy asked, a small grin tugging on her mouth. It faded and she said, "But seriously, if you want to, go ahead. I don’t mind."
Wish Buffy watched her for several very long seconds, and swallowed a couple times. Finally, she carefully said, "Think she’s available now?"
"Just ask her," Buffy smiled.
Joyce sat in the kitchen, nursing a cup of coffee while the others made whatever preparations were needed to make. She had decided to head home after she finished the cup, since her presence would only distract the others. As she took a sip, she was slightly startled when Wish Buffy entered the kitchen.
"Uhm," Wish Buffy said with an equal mix of eagerness and hesitation, "Joyce, do you think it’d be okay if we, well, talk a bit?"
Joyce smiled and put her mug down. "Of course, Buffy," she said, patting the chair next to her. "Sit down and tell me what’s on your mind."
Wish Buffy sat down in the chair and Joyce looked at her. "What is it, honey?"
The Slayer started to speak, but stopped when she couldn’t figure out where to begin. After a few moments, she shook her head. "I’m sorry, this was a mistake. Sorry I wasted your time."
Wish Buffy started to rise, but Joyce grasped her wrist. Wish Buffy looked at the wrist, then Joyce.
"Buffy, you’re not wasting my time. I don’t mind talking. If you need to talk, I’ll listen."
Wish Buffy waited for several seconds before slowly settling down. Joyce released her grip and waited patiently for the alternate Slayer to speak her mind.
Figuring it was as good a place to start as any, she said, "Tell me something, Mo--- Joyce. Are you still married to...Hank?"
Puzzled by this starting point, Joyce shook her head. "No, Buffy. We divorced about two years ago. That’s why Buffy and I moved here."
"He cheated on you, too?" Wish Buffy growled angrily.
"No, Buffy," Joyce quickly answered. She moved to negate the young woman’s anger. "Hank and I were faithful to each other. It’s just that over time, we fell out of love with each other. That’s all."
"My Dad cheated on you...I mean, my Mom," Wish Buffy grumbled. A tear fell down her cheek. "When she died, I left him. I just up and left with Merrick..."
Wish Buffy gazed into Joyce’s eyes, her own glistening with tears as the barriers started to fall. "Why did this happen?" she blurted out with a sob. "I didn’t do anything to her! Why did she have to ruin our lives? Why did...why did she have to KILL YOU?!?"
Joyce reached over and took the crying girl into her arms and just held her while Wish Buffy cried into her shoulder.
Holding onto Joyce like a lifeline, Wish Buffy softly wept, "Why did this happen?"
"I don’t know, honey," Joyce softly answered while she stroked Wish Buffy’s hair. "I don’t know. But I refuse to believe that it was your fault. And deep down, I think you know that, too."
Wish Buffy pulled back, and said, "I *don’t* know that! I don’t know anything anymore! I’m not supposed to *be* here! My whole life... Hell, my whole WORLD is a lie! For all I know I should be like HER!"
"Who?" Joyce asked, despite having a good idea who "she" was.
"HER!!" Wish Buffy snapped as she waved an arm towards the living room. "ME!!! But no! Thanks to Wishy Woman, I’m a cold-hearted killer! I’m like this because SHE took you away from me! I didn’t deserve that, Mom! I don’t deserve to lose you just so God could rub it in my face with this sick-ass ‘This Should’ve Been Your Life’ ripoff!"
Joyce stood up, and said, "You’re not being fair, Buffy."
"Of course it isn’t fair!" Wish Buffy said hoarsely. Looking around, she said, "How can it be fair at all when I get to see everything another copy of me gets to have?!?"
"I meant you’re not being fair to yourself," Joyce firmly said. With a calm voice, Joyce said, "Buffy, come sit down, and I’ll show you that you’re not the cold person you think you are."
Wish Buffy glared at her and asked, "How do *you* know?"
"Because I know what to look for," Joyce replied kindly. "Buffy, when you walked into my shop, when you broke down, I could see in you...I could see the *real* Buffy in your eyes."
"I’m not ‘real,’ Joyce," Wish Buffy snapped in frustration. "Don’t you get it? I’m NOT real! I’m...I’m just something that was dreamed up by some stupid chick with a chip on her shoulder! I..."
Joyce stood up and walked forward. She grabbed Wish Buffy’s wrist, and stared into the Slayer’s eyes.
"You ARE real, Buffy," Joyce decreed. "You’re standing here, right in front of me. I can feel your pulse, you can feel my touch. You aren’t the figment of someone’s imagination, you’re Buffy Summers, the Slayer and a champion of humanity for her world. A new world, perhaps, but a real, living, breathing world that NEEDS her. And when I died in that universe, you didn’t quit, you went on. You did your job. You just made one mistake, Buffy. You became afraid to feel anything, afraid to care about others. You haven’t lost your heart, Buffy. You just closed it off."
Wish Buffy listened to Joyce’s impassioned speech and whispered, "How can you be so sure?"
Joyce placed her hands on Wish Buffy’s shoulders. "Because in my opinion, no matter what world you’re from, no matter who you are, or what you’re afraid you are, I can still see it in your eyes. It’s in there, waiting to get out. I know you may not believe it, but I know you can feel it, in your heart. I may not be the Joyce who raised you, and you may not be the Buffy that I raised, but you are still Elizabeth Anne Summers, Buffy. And that means that you ARE my daughter."
She looked into Joyce’s eyes and simply couldn’t argue against the surety in them. She continued to shed long-overdue tears and threw her arms around Joyce, holding on like a small child hugging her mother. Joyce just held her and let this girl, no, her daughter, sob her heart out.
"I miss her so much," Wish Buffy finally said softly.
Joyce just whispered, "I know, honey. I know."
They held onto each other for a few minutes before Wish Buffy released Joyce and gazed at her Mom’s twin.
"Why do I feel like I’m gonna lose you again when I leave?" Wish Buffy asked in a sad voice. "I mean, I know you’re not her, but..."
"Buffy, just remember this," Joyce told her. She cupped Buffy’s face in her hands. "Whether it’s me saying it or me saying it for your Mother watching you from Heaven, I just want you to remember one thing; I’m VERY proud of you. You’ve been through hard times, you’ve been through sad times, and you’ve been through angry times. But you’re still a fine young woman I’m proud to call my daughter. And remember what I told you; don’t be afraid to feel, or to let others in. Let your heart open back up, and you’ll be the person you want to be."
"I’d like to believe that, Mom, but--"
Joyce cut her off. "Buffy, you talked to the spirit of Joan of Arc less than two hours ago. Then you watched three Amazon witches restore the souls of two vampires whose twins are the best friends of the Buffy from this world. And if I can say that without thinking I’m drunk or on drugs, then believe me when I say that *anything* is possible. Especially you becoming the woman I’m so proud of."
Wish Buffy stared long and hard into Joyce’s smiling eyes. Then she gave Joyce one final hug they knew would be the last embrace they ever shared.
Although reluctant to end the moment, Wish Buffy finally released Joyce, and said with a lopsided smile, "Thanks, Mom. I gotta go. Steve’s holding a powwow on how we’re gonna take out the Master when we get back."
"Take care of yourself, honey," Joyce said in the tone of a fussy mother. "Be careful."
"I will. YOU be careful on the way home," Wish Buffy countered before doing the bravest and most difficult thing she’d ever done.
Buffy Summers turned and walked away, leaving her Mother for a second time.
As she left the kitchen, Joyce sadly whispered, "God, please let her be happy."
"She will be," an accented voice answered behind her.
Startled, Joyce whirled to find Joan standing there with a smile on her face.
Joan just smiled at the open question on Joyce’s face. "Oui, Madame Summers, she will be happy," Joan promised. "I am permitted to tell you that much."
Joyce was originally doubtful, but then felt like kicking herself when she realized just ‘Who’ Joan was really speaking for. She asked, "Will you watch over her?"
"She already has someone watching over her, in her own reality, Madame," Joan said, her smile growing a bit. "Someone much more suited to that task than I."
"Who?" Joyce asked in disbelief. "You report to an Archangel! Who could possibly be more suited than you?"
Joan’s smile became mysterious. "As to whom watches over either Buffy Summers, in this their situations are similar. The Buffy Summers of that reality simply needed you to remind her."
Joyce shook her head in confusion. "I don’t understand..."
"Yes, you do," Joan countered. "After all, as you once said, a mother always knows."
Joan vanished with that and Joyce watched the spot for a long time before smiling herself as the answer became clear. She felt at peace then, as she had the knowledge that Wish Buffy would indeed be looked after.
In the computer room, Vamp Willow was showing that she was up to the task of dealing with the "computer from Hell," as Vamp Xander put it. She’d quickly outlined the alternate Bronze, along with the basement and every single nook and cranny in the club they knew about, based on floor plans from the Bronze that the Slayerettes so often went to.
As she let her fingers fly over the keyboard, under the watchful eyes of Steve, Buffy, JP and the others, Wish Buffy quietly walked in. Buffy gave her an inquisitive look, which Wish Buffy returned with a terse nod.
Wish Buffy leaned in and said, "Mom’s on her way home."
Buffy nodded, and she could see that the other Slayer’s talk with Joyce had done some good.
Wish Buffy looked at the holographic blueprint of the layout of the converted factory as the others stared at it, and her face became grim.
"That’s the place this all started," she said.
"Tell me about it," Vamp Xander said dryly. With a shake of his head, he said, "I mean, that was it? The Master’s big plan? Turning humans into organic soda cans. No demon raising, no Hellmouth opening, no world domination, no mayhem? He fell so far in my eyes."
"Then why were you spouting something about a golden age?" Angel asked.
"Self preservation," Vamps Willow and Xander said together.
Steve looked at Wish Buffy and asked, "Buffy, would you like to add anything?"
Wish Buffy looked at the hologram for several seconds. "Maybe if you did this in 3-D?"
"Gotcha," Vamp Willow cheerfully said, setting her fingers into motion. "You want external or internal view?"
"Say what?"
Steve translated by saying, "Do you want to see the factory from the inside or outside?"
"Outside was pretty standard stuff," Wish Buffy answered. "So inside’s okay."
As the view of the factory shifted, Vamp Willow asked, "Eye level, elevated or overhead?"
Wish Buffy watched in awe as the young vampire’s hands literally flew over the keyboard for several seconds. Vamp Willow looked at her, awaiting an answer.
"Uh, elevated. Angel and I broke in through one of the upper windows," she responded. As Willow adjusted the view, Wish Buffy said, "Damn, you’re good."
Vamp Willow looked at her with a seductive smile on her face. "Has Xander been talking?"
Wish Buffy started to speak, but caught herself. "You ever consider being subtle?" she asked.
"It’s overrated," Vamp Willow declared. "I tried that with Xander for sixteen years, and it never worked."
"Hey!" Vamp Xander blurted, while JP cracked a grin.
<I like this kid’s attitude,> JP thought to himself. <Reminds me of a couple friends of mine.>
An idea began to form in JP’s head, and he made a note to pick up those friends for some fun in the alternate reality.
Wish Buffy looked over the plans and finally said, "I got nothing to add. These two know the place better than I do."
Merlin looked at Steve and asked, "So, are you still going to go on this suicide run, Steve?"
Steve sighed and said, "I thought we had this discussion settled."
"The what, why and how," Merlin admitted. With a sigh, he said, "Okay, Steve. Just be very, very careful."
"Uhm, excuse me," Wish Buffy said uncertainly, "but this is the Master we’re talking about. The big enchilada. Have you guys ever faced anything even remotely this big?"
Steve looked at Buffy, who shrugged. The two Immortals turned to the expectant quartet.
"Keep in mind, this isn’t *everybody*," Buffy said sheepishly. "Just the big names."
"Let’s hear it," Vamp Xander said eagerly. "This should be good."
"Okay," Buffy said with a smile. "First there was Luke, and Darla."
"You took out Luke and Darla?!?" Vamp Xander blurted out.
"Yeah, they were easy compared to the Master," the Slayer said easily. Then she said, "Then there was Spike and Dru..."
"Hmmmm. Spike..." Vamp Willow said dreamily. Noticing the stares from Steve, Buffy and Wish Buffy, she huffed. "What? Dru was staked, and Spike needed some comforting."
Noticing the sick looks from all but Vamp Xander and JP, she confessed, "Okay, okay. It was just a twelve-hour stand. Sheesh. You guys act like I have no stamina."
Buffy looked at Steve and said, "You realize it’s going to take me weeks to get THAT image out of my head?"
"You killed Spike and Drusilla?" Angel asked in a hoarse whisper.
"Not exactly," Steve confessed. "We ran them out of town along with Angelus."
"Who’s next?" Vamp Willow asked.
Steve and Buffy looked at each other, then at Robin and JP, who both shrugged.
"Katherine Plantagenet," Steve started.
"Throlog the Merciless," Buffy added.
"Reginald DeBrachy," JP continued.
"Pinhead the Cenobite," Robin put forth.
"Dracula," the Wanderer said, raising his right hand.
"The Headless Horseman," the Slayer continued, raising her right hand.
"And Ares," Robin finished.
While Vamp Willow, Vamp Xander and Angel listened in mute shock, Wish Buffy threw her hands up and moaned, "Great! Just great! I’m being serious, and these guys are bragging about fighting somebody because of his horoscope sign!"
"Ares," Robin repeated, spelling it out. "A-R-E-S."
Wish Buffy cocked an eyebrow in question, but Vamp Willow and Angel both stammered, "You mean the GOD?!?"
"The Greek God of War," Steve answered in full seriousness. "But in all fairness, we had help from Artemis on that one."
"Why did a Goddess help you trash her bro?" Vamp Xander asked in doubt.
"Hello?" Buffy said. "We have Amazons on our team, remember?"
When Vamp Xander nodded, the Immortal said, "Look, we’ve faced our share of bad guys doing the ‘bringing on the end of the world’ gag. Sometimes, it’s like we’re doing it every week."
"Like a TV show," Wish Buffy muttered. Finally, she admitted defeat. "Okay, okay. But what’s Mom gonna say about you going to another universe?"
"Uh, I was kinda hoping she wouldn’t find out," Buffy confessed. Off Wish Buffy’s shocked expression, she blurted, "Hey, it was bad enough seeing double us’es in her shop, how do you think she’ll react if she finds out I’m going dimension hopping?"
"Good point," Vamps Willow and Xander muttered, with Merlin nodding his head in approval.
"You two stay out of this," Wish Buffy snapped at them. She turned back to Buffy. "And how’s she gonna react when she finds out you went behind her back?"
"I’ll get time off for good behavior," Buffy shrugged. "Besides, what good is it to ground me if I have to break the grounding to save the world every month?"
"Good point," Angel agreed.
"You stay out of this, too," Buffy snapped before continuing. "Look, Buffy. If we just sent the four of you back like Merlin wanted, what chance would you have against the Master? Really, really think about that."
Wish Buffy did think about it, and did something that would have been unthinkable for her less than a week ago. She turned to the three souled vampires and asked, "What do you guys think?"
Vamp Xander and Vamp Willow looked to Angel, making him the spokesman by default.
"You know how I feel," Angel said to all of those present. "I’m all for going back and taking him out. We just can’t do it alone. And if they just help us with this, we can at least make Sunnydale safe again."
"We need their help," Vamp Willow agreed. "Besides, I wanna see these guys beat up someone besides me and Xander. And fighting gets me in the mood for..."
Seeing the looks off the others (except for Vamp Xander and the chuckling JP), she said under her breath, "Shut up, you damn demon."
She meekly looked at Steve and asked, "Anything else on the computer?"
"No, Willow. Thanks a lot," Steve said. He looked at the four displaced people and said, "Why don’t you four take a break while we call in the people we’re taking with us."
Wish Buffy shrugged and head out, followed shortly thereafter by Angel. When the door closed, Vamp Willow looked at the people still in the room.
"Uhm, can we talk about something?" she asked.
Buffy said, "Of course, Will. What’s up?"
"Well..." Vamp Willow said gingerly, "I’m sorry I killed you earlier."
Buffy waved her off. "Demon. End of story."
"We understand that," Vamp Xander put in. "It’s just that, well...when we kill people, they usually tend to stay dead."
Buffy looked at Steve, and the two considered what to tell the teens. Finally, Steve decided to come clean.
"Angel already knew in his universe," Steve said, more to Merlin than anyone else. "Willow, Xander, it’s pretty simple; Buffy and I are Immortal."
Vamps Willow and Xander looked doubtful, to say the least.
Steve launched into an explanation of the concept of Immortality, the Game, and the recent history of Immortals and the revelations brought forth by the scroll of Krevar and Shiva’s announcement in Los Angeles. He then gave them specifics on Buffy and himself, leaving out details he felt best left unsaid, such as beheadings. When he finished, Vamps Willow and Xander took several long, silent seconds to digest the story.
Finally, Vamp Xander asked, "So what's this Prize that you Immortal guys were supposed to fight over?"
"Ultimate power. The power of every Immortal who ever existed," Steve answered.
"Not the sort of thing you'd find in a crackerjack box, huh?"
In the background, Robin tensed a bit.
Vamp Xander looked at the door and asked, "Is that Buffy..."
"No," Steve and Buffy answered together.
"Are you sure?" Vamp Willow asked softly.
"Yes, Willow," Steve told her. "We have ways of detecting Immortals when they come within a certain range, so we would’ve known immediately if she was an Immortal."
Merlin jumped in at this point, telling the two vampires, "And you kids have to know something. You can’t tell her what you just heard, any of it. She has to find out on her own. She might be an Immortal-to-be, or she might not be. She may be completely mortal. Think of it as another one of those timeline differences you’re not allowed to talk about."
"Okay, sure," Vamp Xander agreed, not wishing to argue with a wizard. "So, are we going to call in your friends now?"
"Yep," Steve said firmly. "We’ll see if Robin and Artemis are ready to go and grab some of our allies, then start calling up people to ask for help. And thanks to you two helping out with these plans, we’ll be able to come up with a battle plan that will hopefully limit any casualties from our side."
Vamp Willow and Vamp Xander beamed at Steve’s compliment, which was seconded by a nod and smile from JP. Buffy let herself grow an inward smile at their brightening moods.
"Let’s start dialing," St. Wolf said as he pulled out his cell phone. "Buffy, would you see is Artemis is willing to bring people here?"
Buffy nodded and said, "Xand, Will, come with me. I’ll introduce you to some of our out-of-town friends as they get here, and you two and Angel can get some better clothes on."
"What’s wrong with my outfit?!?" Vamp Willow demanded, putting hands on hips.
"It’s not magical, bulletproof, lightweight body armor," Buffy smiled at Vamp Willow. "Think of it as full body, magic bulletproof vest."
Vamp Xander smiled at that thought, but his girlfriend didn’t seem so eager to try on combat armor.
"But. ."
"And there’s a button in the glove that lets you choose what color it is," the Slayer added without hesitation. "Seven choices."
Now the vampire seemed a little receptive. She asked, "Is it tight in all the right places?"
"We can adjust it," Steve assured her with a mental sigh.
"Cool!" she said with a smile. "Let’s go."
As she headed out of the room, Vamp Xander said, "Great. Fashion tips for the Green Berets."
"You just have to know how to talk to girls, Xander," Buffy grinned.
As they left to catch up to Vamp Willow, Merlin muttered, "Gods, I shudder to think of what the other doubles might be like."
JP blew some smoke and said, "I like ‘em, Mer."
"You would," the wizard moaned.
DeSalvo's Gym
Seacouver, Washington (the Wandererverse)
Late hours
12 December
1998
Robin appeared in the dojo with little fanfare, having used the rationale that he was enlisting a master swordsman to help fight evil to get a teleport spell to Seacouver. He looked around at the dark training area, and cupped his hands over his mouth.
"Hellooooooo?" the sprite said loudly. "Anybody home? That is, anyone of the long-lived, sword-swinging persuasion?"
After a few minutes, Robin was about to call out again when he heard the elevator activate. After a few seconds it reached the first floor and its door slid open to reveal the occupant.
Duncan MacLeod stared at his guest for just a second before replying, "Robin? What's happened?"
"We got a hot one this time, Duncan," Robin snorted. He looked around and asked, "Where's Amanda?"
Duncan hesitantly said, "In Paris on a shopping trip. Or so she says. The others are out of town, too. Richie and Justin went to Vegas, while Jarod and Andrea traveled to London for the holidays."
"So you're the only one available?" Goodfellow asked, suddenly less than enthusiastic about the prospects of ally gathering.
"Methos can come," Duncan answered. With a sly grin, he added, "Why shouldn't we have him help out a bit?"
"Okay," Robin said as he nodded and pursed his lips. "But don't tell him what we're doing, or he'll never agree to go."
"Which is?" the Highlander asked. <This should be good.>
Robin took a deep breath and said, "Taking the Buffy, Angel, Xander and Willow from an alternate universe back home, where Buffy never went to Sunnydale and is still a Pre-Immie, Angel never lost his soul and is still the brooding hero, and Willow and Xander were normal, soulless vampires until Jenny, Amy, and our Willow got their spell casting claws into them about an hour and a half ago, so we can help them wipe out the Master and a few hundred vamps in the Sunnydale in that universe."
Robin watched Duncan regard him with a blank look on his face.
He asked Duncan, "Need me to go over that again?"
"I'm not certain," Duncan confessed. "Do I want you to?"
The fairy quickly considered the question and shook his head. "No, not really."
"Good," the Scotsman said. Turning towards the elevator, he said, "Let me grab my sword and we'll be off."
Residence of Connor MacLeod
Manhattan, New York City, New York (the Wandererverse)
Late
hours
12 December 1998
Connor MacLeod stirred from a sound sleep as the Buzz hit him quite suddenly. Centuries of battle-hardened reflexes asserted themselves as he rolled out of bed.
As his feet touched the floor, Connor crouched and wrapped the fingers of his right hand around the hilt of his katana. With the reassuring feel of the carved ivory handle under his fingertips, Connor took up a defensive posture facing the doorway to his bedroom.
"Not bad," a husky feminine voice said from behind him.
Connor struck with amazing speed, aiming his katana at what he estimated to be the level of the intruder's neck.
Artemis caught the blade of the Masamune in her left hand, abruptly halting its deadly arc.
With a cocked eyebrow and a mischievous smile, the Goddess said, "Nice reflexes, Connor MacLeod."
Connor stiffened in surprise as the identity of his "guest" registered. Yanking his blade free and snarling in disgust, he asked, "What do you want, Artemis?"
"Not to be skewered by your fine weapon," the Goddess said lightly.
Maxine boldly walked into Connor's room and crossly snapped, "Jeez, Connor! Just cut the Boss Lady's head off, why don't ya!"
<Great. Now I'm getting double-teamed,> Connor thought before asking the first thing that came to mind. "May I ask you ladies the purpose of your visit?"
"Some people who need help have come to the Wanderer's attention," the Huntress explained. "Steven plans on helping these people, but there is a deadline for getting these people back to their universe of origin. So, he is calling in those who can come immediately, with the plan of contacting fighters in that universe for help once they arrive."
"Excuse me, Artemis," Connor said as he held his hand up. "Did you say, 'their universe?' As in another dimension?"
"Alternate reality is the actual term, Connor, but yes," the Goddess informed him. "I thought this would be a fine first test for Maxine as an Amazon, as well as offering her a chance to bond with her sisters. But as you are her Immortal teacher, I thought you would prefer to accompany her."
"'Sides, Connor," Maxine said sweetly in her Bronx accent, "if I go an' get my head lopped off, you're gonna have ta break in a new 'slave' at the store. An' you been pissin' and moanin' about St. Wolf since the Boss Lady here laid Her mojo on me. Now you can bust his chops in person."
Connor looked back and forth between the grinning women several times, the only sound being Maxine popping a bubble with her gum. Then, he began to shake his head and laugh while his shoulders sagged in defeat.
"You two discussed this before coming here, didn't you?"
The Goddess and Amazon just continued to grin.
"All right, Artemis," Connor finally said. A grin much like the women's crept onto his face, and he said, "On one condition."
When Artemis cocked her eyebrow, the Highlander said, "You don't tell Mulder and Dana the details of this situation beforehand."
Maxine's snort of laughter sharply contrasted with her Goddess' more sedate giggles.
With a bright smile on her face, she nodded, "It's up to you to have the others in position when they arrive."
"My pleasure," Connor grinned.
Residence of Fox Mulder and Dana Scully
Washington, D. C. (the Wandererverse)
Late
hours
12 December 1998
Mulder and Scully walked into their home, their clothing and hair disheveled and covered with large amounts of dust. As Mulder began engaging the door locks, Scully sent out a silent call.
<Tigger?> she asked telepathically. <We're home.>
//Not for long,// came the Guardian Spirit's reply.
<What's that supposed to mean?> Mulder asked the orange tabby.
"What it means, Fox," Artemis said as she casually walked through the wall of the Agents' bedroom, "is that you're needed immediately in Sunnydale."
"Has something happened, Lady Goddess?" Scully asked with growing concern. "Are the kids all right?"
"They are well," the Goddess assured her. "But of the Immortals in Seacouver, only Duncan and Methos were available for this mission. Steven doesn't have time to call in all of his usual allies, who are on missions of their own. He is gathering a core group to build his assault force."
"Who's in this 'core group?'" Mulder asked cautiously. "And if you don't mind my asking, why were you waiting for us in our bedroom?"
"As for the first, your friends in Sunnydale, save for those protecting the Hellmouth," Artemis began. "Added to those will be Duncan and Connor MacLeod, Methos, and Maxine Thomasson. As to the second question, I expected to find you in there."
"We were on patrol," Scully told her, showing off their dusty clothes. "But we'll finally get to meet Maxine?"
Mulder grinned. "Maybe we can compare methods for picking on Connor."
With a resigned sigh, Artemis said, "Dana, you have my deepest sympathies."
"For what?" Mulder and Scully asked together.
"Your choice of mates," Artemis smiled.
She snapped her fingers before Mulder could protest, sending the two Immortals on their way to Steve's house in a flash of light.
St. Wolf Residence
Sunnydale, California
Late hours
12 December 1998
Mulder and Scully arrived in a brief, blinding flash of light. When the light faded, the husband and wife swiftly looked around to get their bearings. Seeing that they'd been teleported into Steve's training room, they began to relax despite the Buzz hitting both of them.
The doors to the training room burst open seconds later, and Xander and Cordelia rushed in, weapons at the ready. Upon seeing the FBI Agents, they calmed down and put their weapons away.
Cordelia asked, "Artemis?"
"Yes," Dana sighed. Her countenance took on a more professional appearance and she asked, "Can you tell us what's going on?"
"And who's involved?" Mulder asked with a vested interest in the answer.
"Follow us," Xander sighed. The young man turned and led the way towards the living room. "This is one time when seeing is believing."
As they walked, Mulder shot Scully a suspicious glance.
//Are you thinking what I'm thinking?// he asked Dana.
Scully looked at him. //That this mission will be way out there, even for Steve?//
The Agents walked into the living room and stopped dead at the sight that greeted their eyes.
A second Xander, two Willows, two Buffys, and Angel, not to mention all of the others, watching them for their reactions. Scully was shocked into silence, but a quirky grin spread across Mulder’s face.
"This is going to be a fascinating story," he said. "I can tell."
"Shut up, Mulder," Scully snapped as she recovered from the shock. With a look at the Buffys, she asked, "What's the story, Buffy?"
"Well, it starts like this..."
Buffy told the new arrivals the story that the Slayerettes had pieced together through their conversations with the quartet of alternate Sunnydale residents. After the tale had been told, Steve relayed the basic elements of their plans once they arrived in the alternate universe.
When he finished, he asked, "Any questions?"
"One, yes," Mulder said. Looking at Vamp Willow, who was still in her leather outfit, Mulder asked, "Hey, isn't that the leather getup that waifish, red-headed porn star, Bambi Bimbo, wore in 'Sissy the Vampire Layer?'"
The rest of the room fell silent until Cordelia, the implicitly appointed spokesperson said, "Mulder, I think I speak for everyone here when I say...Ewwwww!"
"What?" Mulder asked, addressing all of the people in the room.
Then Vamp Willow smiled coquettishly and purred, "Why yes it is. The costume designer from the movie gave it to me before I ate him. Do you like it?"
Everyone now stared at Vamp Willow, who addressed all of the people in the room. "What?"
"Never mind," the implicitly appointed spokesperson said. "Never mind."
"Okay, moving on to SERIOUS matters," Steve snarled at Mulder, "do you have any problems with going with us?"
Mulder shook his head. "Hey, we're in. Every hero worth his salt has to take a trip to an alternate dimension, right?"
"Like who?" Steve asked in confusion.
Mulder began ticking off on his fingers. "The Justice League, X-Men, Superman, Batman..."
"We're screwed," Robin and Merlin moaned.
"...but I'm wishing this was one of your setups," Scully finished for Mulder. "Here we go again."
With a glance around the room, Mulder asked, "This is it?"
"So far," Steve admitted. He patted his pocket and said, "We're waiting for answers from a couple of others."
"Who?" Duncan asked from the back.
Methos added his two cents as well. "Yes, St. Wolf. Please enlighten us."
After a soft mumble about smart mouthed Immortals, Steve replied, "Well, the bad news is that Casey, Mack, Hannibal and Remo are all busy, and the Knights are on missions in Europe, Asia and Canada. Merlin dropped by to discuss a few things with me for the trip, but he's not going to join us. Something about dimensional activity or the like."
Mulder then asked, "So who IS going, POSSIBLY going, or might know someone who could go?"
"Horace is sending some people," Steve answered. "He was sending someone to pick them up."
"The Ghostbusters?" Amy asked with a snarl. "Don't tell me he's sending them with us after what happened last month."
Steve glared at her. "Not exactly."
Team Tunafish Headquarters
Chicago, Illinois (the Wandererverse)
Early hours
13
December 1998
The alarm began to blare at only three minutes after midnight. As it did so, Bureau 13's finest fighting team responded with the professionalism and rapid deployment one might expect from elite Federal Agents.
Eddie and Jessica Alvarez were the first to enter the living room, followed quickly by George Renault and Tina Blanco. Eddie had quickly grabbed his .357 Magnum with its Dutch load of silver, lead and wooden bullets, while George was armed with his custom-made M60 machine gun.
Raul Horta phased through the wall of his bedroom like a ghost, his mage's staff gleaming with spell energy just waiting to be unleashed. Mindy Jennings, the team's resident martial artist, came out in a more traditional manner, carrying her enchanted katana with its blade shimmering with every color of the rainbow.
Bringing up the rear was Father Donaher, his 12 gauge double-barrel shotgun in his hands.
"Report!" Alvarez barked as he held his pistol at the ready.
Raul closed his eyes and waved his staff around a few times. Finally, he said, "Someone teleported into the computer room."
"I thought the building was shielded against that kind of infiltration," George pointed out.
"It is," Raul said.
Before he could go on, Jessica said, "I sense three people. One's blocked, but the other two..."
"That would be us," came a feminine voice from above.
<Above?> Team Tunafish thought in perfect unison.
The momentary delay in their reactions was enough for the two women to drop from the ceiling and land in the middle of the team's formation and launch their attack.
The taller of the pair, a statuesque woman standing over six feet tall with red hair falling to her waist, attacked Eddie. With surprising speed, the woman grabbed his pajama top with one hand and yanked the .357 out of his hand with the other. She rolled backward and monkey flipped the team leader into Tina Blanco, sending mage and private investigator sprawling to the floor in a heap.
The second attacker, a short woman with blonde hair cut at shoulder length, grabbed the barrel of Renault's machine gun and pulled with apparent superhuman strength. As the rotund soldier stumbled forward, the woman ripped the gun out of his hands while throwing a spinning heel kick that connected with George's large stomach.
Raul began to chant a spell, but the blonde woman, warned by his voice, threw the machine gun at him before he could get the magic to take effect. The Belgian nobleman was sent falling back as the heavy weapon collided with his chest.
Jessica fired a brain blast at the taller intruder, and felt a great deal of satisfaction when the woman went to her knees. Before she could follow up, however, a hand clamped onto her shoulder and spun her around.
As the Chinese woman's eyes widened in surprise, a large cloud of cigarette smoke promptly blinded them.
Seeing her opening, Mindy prepared to capitalize on the advantage handed to her by Jessica. As she prepared to knock the woman out with a punch, so as to have a prisoner for later interrogation, a loud thud distracted her.
Looking over to the side, she saw that the shorter woman had literally thrown George into the wall, taking Donaher with him in the process.
The blonde turned on Mindy and drew a pair of sai short swords, their distinctive trident-style prongs reflecting the light being cast by Mindy's katana.
As the two armed women began to advance on each other, a raspy voice ordered, "HOLD!"
Recognizing that voice, Mindy was suddenly filled with the cold dread that every Bureau 13 Agent felt when the legendary JP Withers was in close proximity.
<Ohhhhhhhh shit!> Mindy thought.
//You took the words right out of my mind,// Jessica shot back at her.
Mindy looked over at Jessica, and noticed JP smirking at her team, a cigarette dangling from his lips. Jessica, on the other hand, was rubbing at teary eyes.
JP took in the sight around him and checked his watch. Nodding in satisfaction, he said, "You kids get an eight point five for reaction time, and a nine point five for performance."
Amid the moans from most of the people present, Jessica blurted, "Eight point five?!? We reacted almost instantly!"
"Emphasis on 'almost,'" the redhead, fully recovered from the telepath's brain blast, replied.
Mindy glared at the taller woman and snapped, "And a nine point five for performance? Jess and I are the only ones still standing!"
The Atlantean approvingly said, "Emphasis on 'still.' Especially against these two. I added a point for Jessica getting the drop on Sonja here."
As the other members of Team Tunafish tried to stand while suffering many aches and pains, Eddie asked, "Yearly ambush readiness review?"
"Pre-Cise-Ly," JP agreed, a small cloud of smoke exiting his mouth with each syllable. "Horace moved you yahoos up on the schedule. Wanted to be sure you weren't getting soft on vacation after helping out against Drac last month."
"Mind introducing us to your... friends?" Renault asked as he held his aching head.
JP grinned at him. "No problem." He pointed to the redhead and said, "Meet Red Sonja of Hyborea, onetime companion of one Conan of Cimmeria. Call her Sonja."
"Pleased to meet you," Sonja said with a grin.
Some of the members of Tunafish didn't recognize her name, but they certainly recognized the name "Conan." Their jaws dropped as they realized this was for real, and that JP was NOT pulling their legs.
"And this," Withers said, feeling a great deal of enjoyment at their shocked expressions, "is Gabrielle, the Battling Bard of Potadea, Amazon Queen, and formerly partner of Xena the Warrior Princess of Amiphobis."
The seven Federal Agents took several seconds to get over their fellow Agent's dual proclamations. Eddie finally said, "Did we pass?"
"'Course not," JP grinned at the Tunafish leader. "If this had been for real, five of you would be dead or injured right now. But in all fairness, you're the first team that had *any* survivors. Congratulations."
"Thank you, sir," Eddie muttered.
"Don't thank me yet, Alvarez," JP said through another cloud of smoke. "We've been handed a mission by Michael."
"Michael?" Mindy asked. "Who's Michael?"
"An Archangel, and General of the Divine Host, the Armies of Heaven. That's who Michael is," JP grinned at them. "Horace okayed the mission, though."
To their credit, Tunafish quickly absorbed this news and stiffened to attention, waiting for their orders.
Eddie seriously asked, "What's the mission, sir?"
JP grinned and looked at the two Immortal women. "I told you these kids were professionals." Turning back to the team, he said, "Your mission, should you choose to like it or not, is to accompany me to Sunnydale, California, to aid one Steve St. Wolf and Section Seven in a mission to eliminate a horde of vampires. This horde of vampires is located in Sunnydale, California, in a previously uncontacted alternate reality. Should you or any of your team be captured or killed, Horace Gordon is sending me along to blow away the bastards who do so. However, despite your fondest wishes, or deepest fantasies, I will NOT self-destruct in five seconds."
JP took one final puff of his cigarette.
"So get cracking."
Tunafish quickly moved to obey his orders.
Sonja nodded approvingly. "You've got them well trained, you old bastard," she said.
"Thank you," JP grinned.
St. Wolf Residence
Sunnydale, California (the Wandererverse)
Early hours
13 December
1998
"That was Horace," Steve said as he closed his cell phone. "He's sending Tunafish."
"And friends," JP's voice said as he and his entourage arrived.
The crowd turned to see the brown clothing-clad Immortal, with Sonja, Gabrielle, and the seven-member Bureau team behind him.
Eddie walked forward and shook Steve's hand. "So what have you been up to, Steve?" he asked with a smile.
Steve grinned back at him. "Just kicking the asses of certain demons and Greek Gods."
"Yeah, I read Spengler's report on that little fight," Eddie chuckled. He backed up a bit and asked, "So is it true you've added even more boy and girl scouts to your little group?"
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